Lavanya Life

Your Kids Watches Your Every Movement

2011-11-07T06:58:00.000-08:00

I'm amazed to look at parents who would wonder why their kids turned out to be the way they are... sometimes they dun realised that they turn out the way they are based on what they learn from their parents.

Even though parents may have the best intentions but if not properly guided, they may misinterpret the message behind.

Just this afternoon, I witnessed a incident and I felt sad for the kids as I wondered how they will turned out to be in future.

I was at this restaurant where a lady was reprimanding the restaurant manager for the blunder that the waiter did.

The small son was making a scene by demanding some things from his mum. Then the waiter accidentally spilled some water over her son's pants. No doubt the waiter is at fault and any caring parent will jump to their kids defence, but asking for a discount or compensation just for that. I mean what kind of distress that they have gone through, just go the toilet and washed up.

Anyway the manager gave in and agreed to pay for the pants. After the manager walked away, the mother was so happy and so were the two kids that were with her, even said that they have gained something for just complaining. I mean what kind of mentality was she ingraining to the two kids - that it's alright to do something wrong and then demand for compensation when actually they have done the wrong thing? I just dun understand.

I'll be Waiting on the Front Porch

2011-10-30T21:00:00.000-07:00

THIS EXPLAINS IT ALL

On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

And God saw it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

And God, again saw it was good.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed it was good.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty,
okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.

Two Choices

2010-04-08T20:56:00.000-07:00

What would you do?....you make the choice. Don't look for a punch line, there isn't one. Read it anyway. My question is: Would you have made the same choice?

At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves children with learning disabilities, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended. After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question: 'When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does, is done with perfection.

Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do.

Where is the natural order of things in my son?'

The audience was stilled by the query.

The father continued. 'I believe that when a child like Shay, who was mentally and physically disabled comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child.'
Then he told the following story:

Shay and I had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me play?' I knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but as a father I also understood that if my son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

I approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.'

Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt. I watched with a small tear in my eye and warmth in my heart. The boys saw my joy at my son being accepted.

In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three.
In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as I waved to him from the stands.

In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again.

Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.

At this juncture, do the others let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game?
Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.

However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact.

The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed.

The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay.

As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher.

The game would now be over.

The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman.

Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.

Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates.

Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, 'Shay, run to first! Run to first!'

Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base.

He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.

Everyone yelled, 'Run to second, run to second!'

Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base.

By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball. The smallest guy on their team who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team.

He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head.

Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home.

All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay'

Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run to third! Shay, run to third!'

As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!'

Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team

'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world'.

Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making me so happy, and coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day !

AND NOW A LITTLE FOOT NOTE TO THIS STORY:

We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people hesitate.

The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces.

If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that you're probably sorting out the people in your address book who aren't the 'appropriate' ones to receive this type of message

Well, the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a difference.

We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the 'natural order of things.'

So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice:

Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up those opportunities and leave the world a little bit colder in the process?

A wise man once said every society is judged by how it treats it's least fortunate amongst them.

You now have two choices:
1. Delete
2. Forward
May your day, be a Shay Day.

Cranky Old Man

2010-03-26T10:41:00.000-07:00

When an old man died in the geriatric ward of a nursing home in country NSW, it was believed that he had nothing left of any value.

Later, when the nurses were going through his meagre possessions, They found this poem. Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the hospital.

One nurse took her copy to Melbourne . The old man's sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas editions of magazines around the country and appearing in mags for Mental Health. A slide presentation has also been made based on his simple, but eloquent, poem.

And this old man, with nothing left to give to the world, is now the author of this 'anonymous' poem winging across the Internet

Cranky Old Man
What do you see nurses? . . . . .What do you see?
What are you thinking .. .. . . . when you're looking at me?
A cranky old man, . . . . . .not very wise,
Uncertain of habit .. . . . . . . . with faraway eyes?

Who dribbles his food .. . .. . . . . and makes no reply.
When you say in a loud voice . .. . . .. 'I do wish you'd try!'
Who seems not to notice . . . . .the things that you do.
And forever is losing . . . . . . . . . . A sock or shoe?

Who, resisting or not .. . . . . . . .. . . . lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding . . . . .. .The long day to fill?
Is that what you're thinking? . . . . . . Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse . . . . . . you're not looking at me

I'll tell you who I am . . . . . . . As I sit here so still,
As I do at your bidding, . . . . . . as I eat at your will.
I'm a small child of Ten . . . . . . . with a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters .. . . . . . . . who love one another
A young boy of Sixteen . . . . . with wings on his feet
Dreaming that soon now . . . . ... . . a lover he'll meet.
A groom soon at Twenty . . . . . . . my heart gives a leap.
Remembering, the vows .. . . . . . that I promised to keep.

At Twenty-Five, now . . . . . ... . . . . I have young of my own.
Who need me to guide . . . . And a secure happy home.
A man of Thirty . . . . . . . . .. My young now grown fast,
Bound to each other . . . . . . . With ties that should last.

At Forty, my young sons .. . . .. . have grown and are gone,
But my woman is beside me . . . . . . . to see I don't mourn.
At Fifty, once more, . . . . . . ..Babies play 'round my knee,
Again, we know children . . . . . . . My loved one and me.

Dark days are upon me . . . . .. . . . My wife is now dead.
I look at the future ... . . . . . . . . . . . . . I shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing . . . . . . young of their own.
And I think of the years . . .. . . . . And the love that I've known.

I'm now an old man . . . . . . . . . and nature is cruel.
It's jest to make old age . . . . . . . look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles .. . . . ... . . . . . grace and vigor, depart.
There is now a stone .. . . . . .. . where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcass . . . .. A young man still dwells,
And now and again . . . .. . . . my battered heart swells
I remember the joys . .. . . . . . . . .. . I remember the pain
And I'm loving and living . . . . .. . . . . . . . . life over again.

I think of the years . all too few . . . . . . gone too fast.
And accept the stark fact . . . . . . . . that nothing can last
So open your eyes, people . . . . . . . . open and see.
Not a cranky old man . Look closer . . . . see . . . .. .. . ME!!

Remember this poem when you next meet an older person who you might brush aside without looking at the young soul within . . . . ..

we will all, one day, be there, too! SHARE THIS POEM

FROGS

2010-02-27T06:51:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time there was a bunch of tiny frogs .... who arranged a running competition.

The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower.

A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants....

The race began....

Honestly:

No one in crowd really believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower.

You heard statements such as:

"Oh, WAY too difficult!!"

"They will NEVER make it to the top."

or:

"Not a chance that they will succeed. The tower is too high!"

The tiny frogs began collapsing. One by one....

Except for those, who in a fresh tempo, were climbing higher and higher....

The crowd continued to yell, "It is too difficult!!! No one will make it!"

More tiny frogs got tired and gave up....

But ONE continued higher and higher and higher....

This one wouldn't give up!

At the end everyone else had given up climbing the tower. Except for the one tiny frog who, after a big effort, was the only one who reached the top!

THEN all of the other tiny frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it?

A contestant asked the tiny frog how he had found the strength to succeed and reach the goal?

It turned out....

That the winner was DEAF!!!!

The wisdom of this story is:

Never listen to other people's tendencies to be

negative or pessimistic.... because they take your most wonderful dreams and wishes away from you -- the ones you have in your heart!

Always think of the power words have.

Because everything you hear and read will affect your actions!

Therefore:

ALWAYS be....

POSITIVE!

And above all:

Be DEAF when people tell YOU that you cannot fulfill your dreams!

Always think:

God and I can do this!

Pass this message on to 5 "tiny frogs" you care about.

Give them some motivation!!!

Most people walk in and out of your life......but FRIENDS leave footprints in your heart

In two days tomorrow will be yesterday. Today is no special day and I have no particular reason for writing to you... I have no news to tell you.... nor any problems to discuss with you.... or gossip to tell you... It's only one of those happy moments ... when I thought of you... and I would like to share these thoughts with you...
MANY SMILES BEGIN BECAUSE OF ANOTHER SMILE...

3 Candles

2009-08-01T20:59:00.000-07:00

A man was having a conversation with Buddha in the middle of the night. Buddha was sitting down while the man was standing.

Man: O Buddha, I have a girlfriend of five years, but now I have fallen madly in love with a new lady. I really don't know what to do.

Buddha: Are you sure that the lady you're now madly in love with is the one you love most, and will be the very last woman in your life?

Man: Yes.

Buddha: Then initiate a break up so you can be with the new lady!

Man: But my current girlfriend is gentle, kind, virtuous. If I initiate a break up, wouldn't it be quite cruel and unethical?

Buddha: In marriage and love, it will only be cruel and unethical if there is no love. You're now in love with another lady and no longer your girlfriend, and a break up is the right thing to do.

Man: But my girlfriend loves me very much, she really loves me very much.

Buddha: Then she is fortunate.

Man: I'm going to leave her for another woman, and this should cause her to be in misery. How can she be fortunate?

Buddha: Because she still possesses the love she has for you, whereas you have lost the love you have for her, because you have fallen for someone new. Accurately speaking, it is a blessing to possess and a misfortune to lose possession, therefore the one in misery is you.

Man: But I'm leaving her for another woman, she should be the one who has lost me and thus feel miserable.

Buddha: You're wrong. You're only an entity in her love life. When you, the entity, no longer exists, her true love will continue on to another entity. Because in her love life, she has never lost true love, therefore she is the one who should be blessed and you the one in pain.

Man: She said she would love only me all her life and not a second man.

Buddha: Have you not said something similar before?

Man: I... I... I...

Buddha: Look at the three candles in the urn before you, the one that shines most brightly.

Man: I don't know, they're all equally bright.

Buddha: These three candles can be likened to three women. One of them is the woman you have fallen for. There are so many humans in existence, and there are more than hundreds of thousands of women. You can't even tell which is the brightest or point out which is the woman you love now, yet why are you so sure the one you love now is that woman, and even more so, how can you be so sure she will be the last woman in your life?

Man: I... I... I...

Buddha: Now put one candle close to you, and look closely which of the three candles are the brightest.

Man: Of course it's the one right in front of me.

Buddha: Now put it back to where it was, and then look again and tell me which is the brightest.

Man: I really cannot tell which is the brighest.

Buddha: Actually, the candle you brought before you is like the woman whom you have fallen for. Love stems from the heart. While you love her, you feel that she is the brightest candle. When you put the candle back to where it was, once again you could not tell which was the brightest candle. This type of love is only a kind of greed that blinds you and looks beautiful and perfect on the surface, but in the end it's only an empty dream.

Man: Oh! Now I know. You didn't really want me to leave my girlfriend, you merely wanted to enlighten me.

Buddha: I won't tell you if you've seen through me. Now, go.

Man: Now I really know who I love - she is my girlfriend.

Buddha: Amituofo, amituofo, amituofo.

When one is alive, one can hardly avoid love. May all lovers in the world cherish the one beside them, steer clear of greed and illusions and create happiness with their special one.

This can really make you cry

2009-07-06T12:00:00.000-07:00

Not sure if this is true story but I just can't help and dropped tears after reading this.

============================================

In Phoenix , Arizona , a 26-year-old mother stared down at her 6 year old son, who was dying of terminal leukemia.

Although her heart was filled with sadness, she also had a strong feeling of determination. Like any parent, she wanted her son to grow up and fulfill all his dreams. Now that was no longer possible.

The leukemia would see to that. But she still wanted her son's dream to come true.

She took her son's hand and asked, 'Billy, did you ever think about what you wanted
to be once you grew up? Did you ever dream and wish what you would do with your life ?'

Mommy, 'I always wanted to be a fireman when I grew up.'

Mom smiled back and said, 'Let's see if we can make your wish come true.'

Later that day she went to her local fire Department in Phoenix , Arizona , where she met Fireman Bob, who had a heart as big as Phoenix .

She explained her son's final wish and asked if it might be possible to give her 6 year-old son a ride around the block on a fire engine.

Fireman Bob said, 'Look, we can do better than that. If you'll have your son ready at seven o'clock Wednesday morning, we'll make him an honorary Fireman for the whole day. He can come down to the fire station, eat with us, go out on all the fire calls, the whole nine yards !

And if you'll give us his sizes, we'll get a real fire uniform for him, with a real fire hat - not a toy -- one-with the emblem of the Phoenix Fire Department on it, a yellow slicker like we wear and rubber boots.'

'They're all manufactured right here in Phoenix , so we can get them fast.'

Three days later Fireman Bob picked up Billy, dressed him in his uniform and escorted him from his hospital bed to the waiting hook and ladder truck.

Billy got to sit on the back of the truck and help steer it back to the fire station. He was in heaven.

There were three fire calls in Phoenix that day and Billy got to go out on all three calls.

He rode in the different fire engines, the Paramedic's' van, and even the fire chief's car.

He was also videotaped for the local news program.

Having his dream come true, with all the love and attention that was lavished upon him, so deeply touched Billy, that he lived three months longer than any doctor thought possible.

One night all of his vital signs began to drop dramatically and the head nurse, who believed in the hospice concept - that no one should die alone, began to call the family members to the hospital.

Then she remembered the day Billy had spent as a Fireman, so she called the Fire Chief and asked if it would be possible to send a fireman in uniform to the hospital to be with Billy as he made his transition.

The chief replied, 'We can do better than that. We'll be there in five minutes. Will you please do me a favor ?

When you hear the sirens screaming and see the lights flashing, will you announce over the PA system that there is not a fire ?' 'It's the department coming to see one of its finest members one more time. And will you open the window to his room ?'

About five minutes later a hook and ladder truck arrived at the hospital and extended its ladder up to Billy's third floor open window -------- 16 fire-fighters climbed up the ladder into Billy's room !!

With his mother's permission, they hugged him and held him and told him how much they LOVED him. With his dying breath, Billy looked up at the fire chief and said, 'Chief, am I really a fireman now ?'

'Billy, you are, and The Head Chief, God , is holding your hand,' the chief said.

With those words, Billy smiled and said, 'I know, He's been holding my hand all day, and the angels have been singing.'

He closed his eyes one last time.

Did I Marry The Right Person?

2009-07-05T12:00:00.000-07:00

This is a very good article. Those who are still single may learn something from here...
Those who are already married may take it as a guideline to improve your marriage & relationship ...

DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?

During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, 'How do I know if I married the right person?' I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, 'It depends. Is that your husband?' In all seriousness, she answered 'How do you know?'

Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind.

Here's the answer.

EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse/partner. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies (unconventional behavior/habit).

Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called 'falling' in love... Because it's happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, 'I was swept off my feet.' Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria (excitement) of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's
idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, 'Did I marry the right person?' And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.

Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could.

And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):

THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't 'find' LASTING love. You have to 'make' it day in and day out. That's why we have the expression 'the labor of love.' Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable... you can 'make' love.

Love in marriage is indeed a 'decision'... Not just a feeling.

Remember always this:

'God determines who walks into your life.It is up to you to decide who you let to walk away,who you let to stay, and who you refuse to let go.

A Story to live by

2009-07-04T09:03:00.000-07:00

There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She told her boyfriend, 'If I could only see the world, I will marry you.'

One day,someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages came off, she was able to see everything, including her boyfriend.

He asked her, 'Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?' The girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The
sight of his closed eyelids shocked her. She hadn't expected that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life led her to refuse to marry him.

Her boyfriend left in tears and days later wrote a note to her saying: 'Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before they were yours, they were mine.'

This is how the human brain often works when our status changes. Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who was always by their side in the most painful situations.

Life Is a Gift

Today before you say an unkind word - Think of someone who can't speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone who's crying out to GOD for a companion.

Today before you complain about life - Think of someone who died too early on this earth.

Before you complain about your children - Think of someone who desires children but they're barren...

Before you argue about your dirty house someone didn't clean or sweep - Think of the people who are living in the streets.

Before whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.

And when you are tired and complain about your job - Think of the unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your
job.

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another - Remember that not one of us is without sin.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on your face and think: you're alive and still around.

Too beautiful not to share.......

7% - Wise Words from a 90-yr old

2009-06-28T12:00:00.000-07:00

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me It is the most-requested column I've ever written."

My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument.. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’ s, we’d grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

A true life story on WHAT GRUDGES CAN DO‏

2009-05-23T21:00:00.000-07:00

Got this thru email from friends, it's really a story worth reading and taken as example in life.... don't lose the moments in life just because of a small quarrel...

This is long but worth reading and is a true story ... you may have received it... but it is worth to be reminded of it again.

WHAT GRUDGES CAN DO....
=======================

This is for all the single, married, divorced, widowed individuals, who take life for granted. Please I BEG YOU, read this story until the end, it is such an opener. You never Know…………………….!

Just two years after our marriage, hubby brought up the idea of asking Mother to move from the rural hometown and spend her remaining years with us. Hubby's father passed away while he was still very young.

Mother endured much hardship and struggled all on her own to provide for him, see him through to a university degree. You could say that she suffered a great deal and did everything you could expect of a woman to bring hubby to where he is today.

I immediately agreed and started packing the spare room, which has a balcony facing the South to let her enjoy the sunshine and plant greenery. Hubby stood in the bright room, and suddenly just picked me up and started spinning round and round. As I begged him to put me down, he said: "Lets go fetch mother." Hubby is tall and big sized and I love to test on his chest and enjoy the feeling that he could pick me up at any moment put the tiny me into his pockets.

Whenever we have an argument and both refuses to back down, he would pick me up and spin me over his head continuously until I surrender and beg for mercy. I became addicted to this kind of panic-joy feeling.

Mother brought along her countryside habits and lifestyle with her.

For example: I am so used to buying flowers to decorate the living room, she could not stand it and would comment: "I do not know how you young people spend your money, why do you buy flowers for? You also can't eat flowers!" I smiled and said: "Mum, with flowers in the house, our mood will also become better." Mother continues to grumble away, and hubby smiled: "Mum, this is a city-people's habit; slowly you will get use to it."

Mother stopped saying anything. But every time thereafter, whenever came home with flowers, she would ask me how much it costs. I told her and she would shake her head and express displeasure.

Sometimes, when I come home with lots of shopping bags, she would ask each and every item how much they cost, I would tell her honestly and she would get even more upset about it. Hubby playfully pinched my nose and said: "You little fool, just don't tell her the full price of everything would solve it."

There begins the friction to our otherwise happy lifestyle.

Mother hates it most when hubby wakes up early to prepare the breakfast. In your view, how could the man of the house cook for the wife? At the breakfast table, mother facial expression is always like the dark clouds before a thunderstorm and I would pretend not to notice. She would use her chopsticks and make a lot of noise with it as her silent protest.

As I am a dance teacher in the Children's Palace and am exhausted from along day of dancing around, I do not wish to give up the luxury of that additional few minutes in the comfort of my bed and hence I turned a deaf ear to all the protest mother makes.

From time to time, mother would help out with some housework, but soon her help created additional work for me. For example:she would keep all kinds of plastic bags accumulating them so that she sell them later on, and resulted in our house being filledwith all the trash bags; she would scrimp on dish washing detergent when helping to wash the dishes and so as not to hurt her feelings, I would quietly wash them again.

One day, late at night, mother saw me quietly washing the dishes, and "Bam" she slams her bedroom door and cried very loudly in her room. Hubby was placed in a difficult position, and after that, he did not speak to me for that entire night.

I pretended to be a spoilt child, tried acting cute, but he totally ignored me.... I got mad and asked him: "What did I do wrong?" Hubby stared at me and said: "Can't you just give in to her once? We couldn't possibly die eating from a bowl however unclean it is, right?" After that incident, for a long period of time, mother did not speak to me and you can feel that there is a very awkward feeling hanging in the house. During that period of cold war, hubby was caught in dilemma as to who to please.

In order to stop her son from having to prepare breakfast, mother took on the "all important" task of preparing breakfast without any prompting. At the breakfast table, mother would look at hubby happily eating his breakfast and cast that reprimanding stare at me
for having failed to perform my duty as a wife. To avoid the embarrassing breakfast situation, I resorted to buying my own breakfast on my way to work.

That night, while in bed, hubby was a little upset and asked me: "LD, is it because you think that mum's cooking is not clean that's why you chose not to eat at home?" He then turned his back on me and left me alone in tears as feeling of unfairness overwhelmed me. After some time, hubby sighed: "LD, just for me, can you have breakfast at home?" I am left with no choice but to return to the breakfast table.

The next morning, I was having porridge prepared by mother and I felt a sudden churn in my stomach and everything inside seem to be rushing up my throat. I tried to suppress the urge to throw up but I could not. I threw down the bowl, rushed into the washroom, and vomited everything out.

Just as I was catching my breath, I saw mother crying and grumbling very loudly in her dialect, hubby was standing at the washroom doorway staring at me with fire burning in his eyes.. I opened my mouth but no words came out of it, I really did not mean it.

We had our very first big fight that day; mother took a look at us, then stood up and slowly made her way out of the house. Hubby gave me a final stare in the eye and followed mother down the stairs. For three days, hubby did not return home, not even a phone call.

I was so furious, since mother arrived; I had been trying my best and putting up with her, what else do you want me to do? For no reason, I keep having the feeling to throw up and I simply have not appetite for food, coupled with all the events happening at home, I was at then low point in my life.

Finally, a colleague said: "LD, you look terrible; you should go and see a doctor." The doctor confirmed that I am pregnant. Now it became clear to me why I threw up that fateful morning, a sense of sadness floated through that otherwise happy news. Why didn't hubby, and mother who had been through this before, thought of the possibility of this being the reason that day?

At the hospital entrance, I saw my hubby standing there. It had only been three days, but he looked haggard. I had wanted to turn and leave, but one look at him and my heart soften, I couldn't resist and called out to him. He followed my voice and finally found me but he pretended that he doesn't know me; he has that disgusted look in his eyes that cut right through my heart. I told myself not to look at him anymore, and hail a cab.

At that moment, I have such a strong urge inside me to shout to my hubby: "Darling, I am having your baby!" and have him lift me up and spin me around in circles of joy. What I wanted didn't happen and as I sat in the cab, my tears started rolling down. Why? Why our love couldn't even withstand the test of one fight?

Back home, I lay on the bed thinking about my hubby, and the disgusted look in his eyes. I cried and wet the corner of the blanket. That night, sound of the drawers opening woke me up. I switched on the lights and I saw hubby with tears rolling down his face. He was removing the money. I stared at him in silence; he ignored me, took the bank deposit book and some money and left the house.

Maybe he really intends to leave me for good.. What a rational man, so clear-cut in love and money matters. I gave a few dried laugh and tears starting streaming down again. The next day, I did not go to work. I wanted to clear this out and have a good talk with hubby. I reached his office and his secretary gave me a weird look and said: "Mr. Tan's mother had a traffic accident and is now in the hospital."

I stood there in shock. I rushed to the hospital and by the time I found hubby, mother had already passed away. Hubby did not look at me, his face was expressionless. I looked at mother's pale white and thin face and I couldn't control the tears in my eyes. My god, how could this happen?

Throughout the funeral, hubby did not say a single word to me, with only the occasional disgusted stare at me. I only managed to find out brief facts about the accident from other people. That day, after mother left the house, she walked in dazed toward the bus stop, apparently intending to go back to her old house back in the countryside.

As hubby ran after her, she tried to walk faster and as she tried to cross the street, a public bus came and hit her! ... I finally understood how much hubby must hate me, if I had not thrown up that morning, if we had not quarreled, if....In his heart, I am indirectly the killer of his mother..

Hubby moved into mother's room and came home every night with a strong liquor smell on him. And me, I am buried under the guilt and self-pity and could hardly breathe. I wanted to explain to him, tell him that we are going to have our baby soon, but each time, I saw the dead look in his eyes, all the words I have at the brink of my mouth just fell back in.

I had rather he hit me real hard or give me a big and thorough scolding though none of these events happening had been my fault at all. Many days of suffocating silence went by and as the days went by, hubby came home later and later. The deadlock between us continues, we were living together like strangers who don't know each other. I am like the dead knot in his heart.

One day, I passed by a western restaurant, looking into the glass window, I saw hubby and a girl sitting facing each other and he very lightly brushed her hair for her, I understood what it meant. After recovering from that moment of shock, I entered the restaurant, stood in front of my hubby and stared hard at him, not a tear in my eyes. I have nothing to say to him, and there is no need to say anything. The girl looked at me, looks at hubby, stands up and wanted to go, hubby stretched out his hand and stopped her. He stared back at me, challenging me. I can only hear my slow heart beat, beating, one by one as if at the brink of death.

I eventually backed down, if I had stood that any longer, I will collapse together with the baby inside me.. That night, he did not come home; he had chosen to use that as a way to indicate to me:Following mother's death so did our love for each other...

He did not come home anymore after that. Sometimes, when I returned home from work, I can tell that the cupboard had been touched - he had returned to take some of his stuff. I no longer wish to call him; the initial desire to explain everything to him vanished.

I lived alone; I go for my medical checkups alone, my heart breaks again and again every time I see a guy carefully helping his wife through the physical examination. My office colleagues hinted to me to consider aborting the baby, I told them No, I will not.. I insisted on having to this baby, perhaps it is my way of repaying mother for causing her death.

One day, I came home and I saw hubby sitting in the living room. The whole house was filled with cigarette smoke. On the coffee table, there was this piece of paper. I know what it is all about without even looking at it. In the two months plus of living alone, I have gradually learned to find peace within myself. I looked at him, removed my hat and said: "You wait a while, I will sign." He looked at me, mixed feelings in his eyes, just like mine.

As I hang up my coat, I keep repeating to myself "You cannot cry, you cannot cry..." my eyes hurt terribly, but I refused to let tears come out from there. After I hung up my coat, hubby's eyes stared fixed at my bulging tummy. I smiled, walked over to the coffee table and pulled the paper towards me. Without even looking at what it says, I signed my name on it and pushed the paper to him. "LD, are you pregnant?" Since mother's accident, this is the first time he spoke to me. I could not control my tears any further and they fell like raindrops. I said: "Yes, but its ok, you can leave now." He did not go, in the dark, we sat, facing each other.

Hubby slowly moved over me, his tears wet the blanket. In my heart, everything seems so far away, so far that even if I sprint, I could never reach them. I cannot remember how many times he repeated "sorry" to me. I had originally thought that I would forgive him, but now I can't. In the western restaurant, in front of that girl, that cold look in his eyes, I will never forget, ever.

We have drawn such deep scars in each other's heart. For me, it's unintentional; for him, totally intentional. I had been waiting for this moment of reconciliation, but I realized now, what had gone past is gone forever and could not repeated.

Other than the thought of the baby inside me that would bring some warmth to my heart, I am totally cold towards him, I no longer eat anything he buys for me, I don't take any presents from him and I stopped talking to him..

From the moment I signed on that piece of paper, marriage and love had vanished from my heart. Sometimes, hubby will try to come into the bedroom, but when he walks in, I will walk out to the living room.

He had no choice but to sleep in mother's room. At night, from his room, I can hear light sounds of groaning, I kept quiet. This used to be his trick; last time, whenever I ignore him, he would fake illness and I will surrender and find out what is wrong with him, he would then grab me and laugh.

He has forgotten that last time I cared for him and am concerned because there was love, but now, what is there between us? Hubby's groaning came on and off continuing but I continuously ignored him.

Almost everyday, he would buy something for the baby, infant products, children products and books that kids like to read.. Bags and bags of it stacked inside his room till it is full. I know he is trying to use this to reach out to me, but I am no longer moved by his actions. He has no choice but to lock himself in his room and I can hear his typing away on his computer keyboard, maybe he is now addicted to web surfing but none of that matters to me anymore.

It was sometime towards the end of spring in the following year, one late night, I screamed because of a sudden stomach pain, hubby came rushing into the room, its like he did not change and sleep, and had been waiting for this moment. He carried me and ran down the stairs, stopped a car, holding my hand very tightly and kept wiping the sweat off my brow, throughout the journey to the hospital.

Once we reached the hospital, he carried me and hurried into the delivery suite. Lying on the back of his skinny but warmth body, a thought crossed my mind: In my lifetime, who else would love me as much as he did?

He held the delivery suite door opened and watch me go in; his warm eyes caused me to manage a smile at him despite my contraction pain. Coming out of the delivery room, hubby looked at our son and me, eyes tear with joy and he kept smiling. I reached out and touched his hand.

Hubby looked at me, smiling and then he slowly collapsed onto the floor. I cried out for him in pain... He smiled, but without opening that tired eyes of his... I had thought that I would never shed any tear for him, but the truth is, I have never felt a deeper pain cutting through my body at that moment.

Doctor said that by the time hubby discovered he had liver cancer, it was already in terminal stage and it was a miracle that he managed to last this long. I asked the doctor when he first discovered he had cancer. Doctor said about 5 months ago and consoled me saying: "Prepare for his funeral."

I disregarded the nurse's objection and rushed home, I went into his room and checked his computer, and a suffocating pain hits me.

Hubby's cancer was discovered 5 months ago, his groaning was real, and I had thought that... the computer showed over 200 thousand words he wrote for our son: "Son, just for you, I have persisted, to be able to take a look at you before I fall, is my biggest wish now... I know that in your life, you will have many happiness and maybe some setbacks, if only I can accompany you throughout that journey, how nice would it be. But daddy now no longer has that chance. Daddy has written inside here all the possible difficulties and problems you may encounter during your lifetime, when you meet with these problems, you can refer to daddy's suggestion.....

Son, after writing these 200 thousand words, I feel as if I have accompanied you through life journey. To be honest, daddy is very happy. Do love your mother, she has suffered, she is the one who loves you most and also the one who loves me most..."

From play school to primary school, to secondary, university, to work and even in dealing with questions of love, everything big and small was written there.

Hubby has also written a letter for me:

"My dear, to marry you is my biggest happiness, forgive me for the pain I have caused you, forgive me for not telling you my illness, because I want to see you be in a joyful mood waiting for the arrival of our baby...My dear, if you cried, it means that you have forgiven me and I would smile, thank you for loving me...These presents, I'm afraid I cannot give them to our son personally, could you help me to give some of them to him every year, the dates on what to give when are all written on the packaging... "

Going back to the hospital, hubby is still in coma. I brought our son over and place him beside him. I said: "Open your eyes and smile, I want our son to remember being in the warmth of your arms..." He struggled to open his eyes and managed a weak smile. Our son still in his arms was happily waving his tiny hands in the air. I press the button on the camera and the sound of the shutter rang through the air as tears slowly rolled down my face.....

A fatal misunderstanding and the person who loves me the most in this world is gone forever..."Cruel misunderstandings! one after another disrupted the blissful footsteps to our family. Our originals intend of having Mother enjoy some quiet and peaceful moments in her remaining years with us went terribly wrong as destiny's secret is finally revealed at a price, every thing became too late.".........

This is a true story...
LEARNING POINT - DO NOT EVER HOLD ON TO OFFENCES!!!

I am totally speechless, this story brought tears to my eyes as I read through each line eager to know what would happen next. It truly showed the devastating power of grudges and anger!

Simple humility and communication would have resolved most of the problems in that story, as well as patience.... This story has really touched my heart and life as a whole and it has stimulated a paradigm shift.. Though it is very sad, it is also very refreshing to know that from today, I can consciously start to live a life free of grudge. People please let’s live a life devoid
of grudges.

Communication with your loved ones is THE key.

The Old Fisherman

2009-03-13T01:18:00.000-07:00

I have received this via email from a friend and I find it so meaningful that I would like to share it with anyone and everyone who come to my blog.

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Our house was directly across the street from the clinic entrance of Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore We lived downstairs and rented the upstairs rooms to out-patients at the Clinic.

One summer evening as I was preparing supper, there was a knock at the door I opened it to see a truly awful looking man. 'Why, he's hardly taller than my eight-year-old,' I thought as I stared at the stooped, shriveled body.

But the appalling thing was his face, lopsided from swelling, red and raw Yet his voice was pleasant as he said, 'Good evening. I've come to see if you've a room for just one night. I came for a treatment this morning from the eastern shore, and there's no bus 'till morning.'

He told me he'd been hunting for a room since noon but with no success; no one seemed to have a room. 'I guess it's my face. I know it looks terrible, but my doctor says with a few more treatments...'

For a moment I hesitated, but his next words convinced me: 'I could sleep in this rocking chair on the porch. My bus leaves early in the morning.' I told him we would find him a bed, but to rest on the porch. I went inside and finished getting supper. When we were ready, I asked the old man if he would join us. 'No thank you. I have plenty' And he held up a brown paper bag.

When I had finished the dishes, I went out on the porch to talk with him a few minutes. It didn't take a long time to see that this old man had an oversized heart crowded into that tiny body. He told me he fished for a living to support his daughter, her five children and her husband, who was hopelessly crippled from a back injury.

He didn't tell it by way of complaint; in fact, every other sentence was prefaced with thanks to God for a blessing. He was grateful that no pain accompanied his disease, which was apparently a form of skin cancer. He thanked God for giving him the strength to keep going.
At bedtime, we put a camp cot in the children's room for him. When I got up in the morning, the bed linens were neatly folded, and the little man was out on the porch.

He refused breakfast, but just before he left for his bus, haltingly, as if asking a great favor, he said, 'Could I please come back and stay the next time I have a treatment? I won't put you out a bit. I can sleep fine in a chair.' He paused a moment and then added, 'Your children made me feel at home. Grownups are bothered by my face, but children don't seem to mind.' I told him he was welcome to come again.

And on his next trip he arrived a little after seven in the morning. As a gift, he brought a big fish and a quart of the largest oysters I had ever seen. He said he had shucked them that morning before he left so that they'd be nice and fresh. I knew his bus left at 4 a.m. , and I wondered what time he had to get up in order to do this for us.

In the years he came to stay overnight with us there was never a time that he did not bring us fish or oysters or vegetables from his garden.

Other times we received packages in the mail, always by special delivery; fish and oysters packed in a box of fresh young spinach or kale, every leaf carefully washed. Knowing that he must walk three miles to mail these and knowing how little money he had made the gifts doubly precious.

When I received these little remembrances, I often thought of a comment our next-door neighbor made after he left that first morning. 'Did you keep that awful looking man last night? I turned him away! You can lose roomers by putting up such people!'

Maybe we did lose roomers once or twice But, oh! If only they could have known him, perhaps their illness would have been easier to bear. I know our family always will be grateful to have known him; from him we learned what it was to accept the bad without complaint and the good with gratitude to God.

Recently I was visiting a friend who has a greenhouse. As she showed me her flowers, we came to the most beautiful one of all, a golden chrysanthemum, bursting with blooms. But to my great surprise, it was growing in an old dented, rusty bucket. I thought to myself, 'If this were my plant, I'd put it in the loveliest container I had!'

My friend changed my mind. 'I ran short of pots,' she explained, 'and knowing how beautiful this one would be, I thought it wouldn't mind starting out in this old pail. It's just for a little while, till I can put it out in the garden.'

She must have wondered why I laughed so delightedly, but I was imagining just such a scene in heaven. There's an especially beautiful one,' God might have said when he came to the soul of the sweet old fisherman. 'He won't mind starting in this small body.'

All this happened long ago -- and now, in God's garden, how tall this lovely soul must stand.

The LORD does not look at the things man looks at.. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.'

Friends are very special. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear and they share a word of praise. Show your friends how much you care.

Pass this on, and brighten someone's day..

Nothing will happen if you do not decide to pass it along.

The only thing that will happen if you do pass it on is that someone might smile ~ because of you!

Friends are special Hugs from God!

New Office Policy

2009-03-10T01:18:00.000-07:00

EFFECTIVE AUGUST 1, 2008
NEW OFFICE POLICY

Dress Code:

1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary.

2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.

3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.

4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.

Sick Days:

We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work .

Personal Days:

Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturdays & Sundays.

Bereavement Leave:

This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend the funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.

Bathroom Breaks:

Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the 'Chronic Offenders' category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company's mental health policy.

Due to Budget Cut, This will be Your New Cubicle

2009-03-08T01:18:00.000-08:00

Business Logics

2009-03-06T01:18:00.000-08:00

Father: I want you to marry a girl of my choice
Son: 'I will choose my own bride!'
Father: 'But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter.'
Son: 'Well, in that case...ok'

Next Father approaches Bill Gates.
Father: 'I have a husband for your daughter.'
Bill Gates: 'But my daughter is too young to marry!'
Father: 'But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank.'
Bill Gates: 'Ah, in that case...ok'

Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Father: 'I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president.'
President: 'But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!'
Father: 'But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law.'
President: 'Ah, in that case...ok'

This is how business is done!!

Moral: Even If you have nothing, You can get Anything. But your attitude should be positive

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What is Marketing?

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say, 'I am very rich. Marry me!'
That's Direct Marketing

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.
One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, 'He's very rich. Marry him.'
That's Advertising.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and get her telephone number.
The next day you call and say, 'Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me.'
That's Telemarketing.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl.
You get up and straighten your tie; you walk up to her and pour her a drink.
You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her a ride, and then say, 'By the way, I'm very rich 'Will you marry me?'
That's Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl.
She walks up to you and says, 'You are very rich, I want to marry you.'
That's Brand Recognition.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say, 'I'm rich. Marry me'
She gives you a nice hard slap on your face.
That's Customer Feedback

The Best Kind of Love

2009-03-04T13:18:00.000-08:00

I have received this email from a friend and I would like to share with everyone this beautiful article and that this will benefit you one way or another.

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By Annette Paxman Bowen

I have a friend who is falling in love. She honestly claims the sky is bluer. Mozart moves her to tears. She has lost 15 pounds and looks like a cover girl. "I am young again!" she shouts exuberantly.

As my friend raves on about her new love, I've taken a good look at my old one. My husband of almost 20 years, Scott, has gained 15 pounds. Once a marathon runner, he now runs only down hospital halls. His hairline is receding and his body shows signs of long working hours and too many candy bars. Yet he can still give me a certain look across a restaurant table and I want to ask for the check and head home. When my friend asked me "What will make this love last?" I ran through all the obvious reasons: commitment shared interests, unselfishness, physical attraction, and communication.

Yet there's more. We still have fun. Spontaneous good times. Yesterday, after slipping the rubber band off the rolled newspaper, Scott flipped it playfully at me: this led to an all-out war. Last Saturday at the grocery, we split the list and raced each other to see who could make it to the checkout first. Even washing dishes can be a blast. We enjoy simply being together.

And there are surprises.

One time I came home to find a note on the front door that led me to another note, then another, until I reached the walk-in closet. I opened the door to find Scott holding a "pot of gold" (my cooking kettle) and the "treasure" of a gift package. Sometimes I leave him notes on the mirror and little presents under his pillow.

There is understanding.

I understand why he must play basketball with the guys. And he understands why, once a year, I must get away from the house, the kids - and even him - to meet my sisters for a few days of nonstop talking and laughing.

There is sharing.

Not only do we share household worries and parental burdens - we also share ideas. Scott came home from a convention last month and presented me with a thick historical novel. Though he prefers thrillers and science fiction, he had read the novel on the plane. He touched my heart when he explained it was because he wanted to be able to exchange ideas about the book after I'd read it.

There is forgiveness.

When I'm embarrassingly loud and crazy at parties, Scott forgives me. When he confessed losing some of our savings in the stock market, I gave him a hug and said, "It's okay. It's only money."

There is sensitivity.

Last week he walked through the door with that look that tells me it's been a tough day. After he spent some time with the kids, I asked him what happened. He told me about a 60-year old woman that had a stroke. He wept as he recalled the woman's husband standing beside her bed, caressing her hand. How was he going to tell this husband of 40 years that his wife would probably never recover? I shed a few tears myself. Because of the medical crisis. Because there were still people who have been married 40 years. Because my husband is still moved and concerned after years of hospital rooms and dying patients.

There is faith.

Last Tuesday a friend came over and confessed her fear that her husband is losing his courageous battle with cancer. On Wednesday I went to lunch with a friend who is struggling to reshape her life after divorce. On Thursday a neighbor called to talk about the frightening effects of Alzheimer's disease on her father-in-law's personality. On Friday a childhood friend called long-distance to tell me her father had died. I hung up the phone and thought, This is too much heartache for one week. Through my tears, as I went out to run some errands, I noticed the boisterous orange blossoms of the gladiolus outside my window. I heard the delighted laughter of my son and his friend as they played. I caught sight of a wedding party emerging from a neighbor's house. The bride, dressed in satin and lace, tossed her bouquet to her cheering friends. That night, I told my husband about these events. We helped each other acknowledge the cycles of life and that the joys counter the sorrows. ! It was enough to keep us going.

Finally, there is knowing.

I know Scott will throw his laundry just shy of the hamper every night; he'll be late to most appointments and eat the last chocolate in the box. He knows that I sleep with a pillow over my head; I'll lock us.

I guess our love lasts because it is comfortable. No, the sky is not bluer: it's just a familiar hue. We don't feel particularly young: we've experienced too much that has contributed to our growth and wisdom, taking its toll on our bodies, and created our memories. I hope we've got what it takes to make our love last. As a bride, I had Scott's wedding band engraved with Robert Browning's line "Grow old along with me!"

We're following those instructions. "If anything is real, the heart will make it plain." There are some people who meet that somebody that they can never stop loving, no matter how hard they try. I wouldn't expect you to understand that, or even believe it, but trust me, there are some love that don't go away. And maybe that makes them crazy, but we should all be blest to end up with that somebody who has a little of that insanity. Somebody who never lets go. Somebody who cherishes you forever. Hope you find this kind of love in your life.

What are the BIG STONES in your life

2009-03-02T13:18:00.000-08:00

One day, an old professor of the national School of administration (ENA-France) was asked to give a training-course on the effective economic planning of one's time to a group of about fifteen leaders of big companies from North - America.

This course constituted one of 5 workshops of their day of training. So, the old Prof. only had one hour to spend on this subject.

Standing in front of this group of elite who was ready to note everything that the expert was going to teach, the old Prof. looked at them one by one, slowly, then said to them: "We are going to make an experiment".

From under the table which separated him from his pupils, the old Prof. took out an immense jar Mason of a gallon (glass jar of more than 4 liters) which he directly put in front of him.

Then, he took out about a dozen pebbles roughly as big as tennis balls and placed them delicately, one by one, in the big jar. When the jar was filled up to the brim, and when it was impossible to add anything to it, he raised slowly his eyes towards the pupils, and asked them: "Is this jar full?"

Everybody answered: "Yes".

He waited for a few seconds and added: "Really?"

Then, he bent again and took out from under the table a pot filled with little stones. With accuracy, he poured these little pebbles on the big stones, then moved softly the jar.

The fragments of little pebbles went between the stones down to the bottom of the jar. The old Prof. raised his eyes again towards his audience and asked: "Is this jar full?".

This time, his brilliant pupils began to understand the whole process. One of them answered:

"Probably not!"

"Well!" answered the old Prof..

He bent again and this time, took out from under the table a bucket of sand. With attention, he poured the sand into the jar. The sand went to fil the spaces between the big big stones and the little pebbles. Once again, he asked:

"Is this jar full?". This time, without hesitation, and in a choir, the brilliant pupils answered: "No!"

"Well!" answered the old Prof. And, as expected by the brilliant pupils, he took the jug of water which was on the table and filled the jar up to the brim. Then, the old Prof raised his eyes towards his group and asked: "Which big truth does this experiment show to us?"

Being no fool, the most audacious of the pupils, thinking about the topic of this course, answered: "It shows that even when one believes that our diary is completely filled, if one wants really wants it, one can add more meetings to it, more things to be made".

The old Prof. answered. "It is not that".

"The big truth that this experiment shows to us is the following one:
- "If one does not put the big stones first in the jar, one will never be able to make all of them go in, then".

There was a profound silence, each becoming aware of the evidence of these comments.

Then, the old Prof told them: "Which are the big stones in your life?"

"Your health?"

"Your family?"

"Your friends?"

"To make your dreams come true?"

"Learning?"

"To do what you enjoy?"

"To relax?"

"To fight for a cause?"

"To take time for yourself?"

"Or any other thing?"

"What it is necessary to remember is the importance to put one's BIG STONES in first in one's life, otherwise one encours the risks not succeed in one's life.

If one gives priority to pecadilloes (the little pebbles, the sand), one will fill one's life with pecadilloes and one will have no more enough precious time to dedicate to the important elements of one's life".

Then do not forget to ask to yourself this question: "Which are the BIG STONES IN MY LIFE? Then, put them in, first"

With a friendly gesture of the hand, the old professor greeted his audience and slowly left the room.

When you are angry....

2009-02-28T13:18:00.000-08:00

This is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his astonishment, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into a pulp as punishment.

When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked,"but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide.

Think about the story the next time u see someone spill milk at a dinner table or hear a baby crying. Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Trucks can be repaired. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't.

Too often we fail to recognise the difference between the person and the performance. People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes.
But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever. Think before
you act. Be patient. Understand & love.

Money Is Not Everything...

2009-02-26T13:18:00.000-08:00

Money can buy house
but not home.

Money can buy bed
but not sleep.

Money can buy clock
but not time.

Money can buy book
but not knowledge.

Money can buy dresses
but not pretty,

Money can buy slim
but not happy.

Money can buy food
but not appetite.

Money can buy position
but not respect.

Money can buy blood
but not life.

Money can buy medicine
but not health.

Money can buy sex
but not love.

Money can buy insurance
but not safety.

You see, money is not everything.
Therefore, if you have too much, please give some to me! ;-)

Work Work Work

2009-02-24T13:00:00.000-08:00

A long time ago, there was an Emperor who told his horseman that if he could ride on his horse and cover as much land area as he likes, then the Emperor would give him the area of land he has covered.

Sure enough, the horseman quickly jumped onto his horse and rode as fast as possible to cover as much land area as he could. He kept on riding and riding, whipping the horse to go as fast as possible. When he was hungry or tired, he did not stop because he wanted to cover as much area as possible.

Came to a point when he had covered a substantial area and he was exhausted and was dying. Then he asked himself, "Why did I push myself so hard to cover so much land area? Now I am dying and I only need a very small area to bury myself."

The above story is similar with the journey of our Life. We push very hard everyday to make more money, to gain power and recognition. We neglect our health, time with our family and to appreciate the surrounding beauty and the hobbies we love.

One day when we look back, we will realize that we don't really need that much, but then we cannot turn back time for what we have missed.

Life is not about making money, acquiring power or recognition. Life is definitely not about work! Work is only necessary to keep us living so as to enjoy the beauty and pleasures of life. Life is a balance of Work and Play, Family and Personal time. You have to decide how you want to balance your Life. Define your priorities, realize what you are able to compromise but always let some of your decisions be based on your instincts. Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of Life, the whole aim of human existence.

So, take it easy, do what you want to do and appreciate nature. Life is fragile, Life is short. Do not take Life for granted. Live a balanced lifestyle and enjoy Life!

Watch your thoughts ; they become words.
Watch your words ; they become actions.
Watch your actions ; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

The Magic of Giving

2008-12-24T01:00:00.000-08:00

My wife and I spent a month holidaying in Southern France.

I don't remember ever being as happy as I was during the short time we spent there.

I was truly happy to be alive.

On hot days, we spent out time inside our cool room reading or chatting. Towards the evenings, we often went for walks. During our walks we'd stop to look at the bowers along the road. The road, which was made of red sand, ran along the mountain; lavenders grew on one side of it and olive trees grew on the other.

We enjoyed the scenery as we walked through the village. The beauty around us added to our joy.

The local people all said they were very happy to see us walking hand-in-hand, smiling, serene, poised and open to strangers. I only realized how much our happiness affected them when the farmers gave us a special gift which they usually reserved for a big occasion or some unexpected pleasant surprise: dry sausage and a bottle of anisette.

On each of our walks we made new friends who cemented our friendship with lovely gifts.

We finally returned home. After spending a month in sunny, friendly Provence, our city seemed cold; the days and nights appeared longer than usual, and even clients seemed uninterested in my work.

One evening, as I sat in a cafe, with my head on my hand, thinking of our time in Provence and the lavish welcome of it's people, it hit me. I realized why the villagers back in France treated us as they did: they were giving us back what they had received from us - the gift of joy.

Don't expect anything from others which you don't give yourself: give a smile when you're sad, a warm handshake when your heart is cold, a positive thought when you see nothing but dark things in your life....

...............................................................

When your happiness radiates out and touches those around you, including strangers, you communicate something to them. Something which makes them want to respond in a positive way to you.

Give joy without expecting anything in return and you will put people in the best possible disposition to give and be open with you.

...............................................................

"What is good about giving on your part is that you always receive more than you give; the reaction is always stronger than the action."
Orison S. Marden

The story of the black balloons

2008-12-22T01:00:00.000-08:00

A young black boy saw a balloon seller on a street corner. His eyes sparkled as he gazed at all the different colored balloons - red, blue, white, black, yellow...

The old man selling the balloons saw the boy hesitate, than gather his courage and approach.

"Tell me mister," said the boy, "do the black balloons fly as high as the others?"

The old man felt a tear forming in his eye. He picked the boy up, sat him on his knee and said, "Look."

He let go of all the balloons. They drifted up in a cluster, higher and higher into the blue sky until they were so high they disappeared.

"Did you see that?" the balloon seller asked.

"Yes," said the boy.

"Did the black balloons fly as high as the others?"

"Yes Mister, they did."

"You see my boy, the balloons are like people. The important thing isn't their color, or what they look like on the outside. No, the important thing is WHAT'S INSIDE. And what's inside you makes all the difference in life."

The Miracle of a Brother's Song

2008-12-20T01:00:00.000-08:00

Like any good mother, when Karen found out that another baby was on the way, she did what she could to help her 3-year-old son, Michael, prepare for a new sibling. They found out that the new baby was going be a girl, and day after day, night after night, Michael sang to his sister in Mommy's tummy. He was building a bond of love with his little sister before he even met her.

The pregnancy progressed normally for Karen. In time, the labor pains came. Soon it was every five minutes, every three, every minute .But serious complications arose during delivery and Karen found herself in hours of labor. Would a C-section be required? Finally, after a long struggle, Michael's little sister was born. But she was in very serious condition. With a siren howling in the night, the ambulance rushed the infant to the neonatal intensive care unit at Mary's Hospital, Knoxville, Tennessee.

The days inched by. The little girl got worse. The pediatrician had to tell the parents there is very little hope. Be prepared for the worst. Karen and her husband contacted a local cemetery about a burial plot. They had fixed up a special room in their house for their new baby but now they found themselves having to plan for a funeral. Michael, however, kept begging his parents to let him see his sister. "I want to sing to her", he kept saying. Week two in intensive care looked as if a funeral would come before the week was over.

Michael kept nagging about singing to his sister, but kids are never allowed in Intensive Care. Karen decided to take Michael whether they liked it or not. If he didn't see his sister right then, he may never see her alive. She dressed him in an oversized scrub suit and marched him into ICU. He looked like a walking laundry basket. The head nurse recognized him as a child and bellowed, "Get that kid out of here now. No children are allowed." The mother rose up strong in Karen, and
the usually mild-mannered lady glared steel-eyed right into the head nurse's face, her lips a firm line, "He is not leaving until he sings to his sister" she stated. Then Karen towed Michael to his sister's bedside.

He gazed at the tiny infant losing the battle to live. After a moment, he began to sing. In the pure-hearted voice of a 3-year-old, Michael sang: "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray." Instantly the baby girl seemed to respond. The pulses rate began to calm down and become steady. "Keep on singing, Michael," encouraged Karen with tears in her eyes. "You never know, dear, how much I love you, please don't take my sunshine away."

As Michael sang to his sister, the baby's ragged, strained breathing became as smooth as a kitten's purr. "Keep on singing, sweetheart." "The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping, I dreamed I held you in my arms". Michael's little sister began to relax as rest, healing rest, seemed to sweep over her. "Keep on singing, Michael." Tears had now conquered the face of the bossy head nurse. Karen glowed. "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. Please don't take my sunshine away..."

The next, day...the very next day...the little girl was well enough to go home. Woman's Day Magazine called it The Miracle of a Brother's Song. The medical staff just called it a miracle. Karen called it a miracle of God's love.

NEVER GIVE UP ON THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE. LOVE IS SO INCREDIBLY POWERFUL. Life is good. Have a Wonderful Day!

The Window View

2008-12-18T01:00:00.000-08:00

Got this email from my friend and it has given me a new perspective in life, as I began to see things differently. I hope that this will do the same for you. Be Happy Always!!!

=========================
Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man couldn't hear the band -- he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days and weeks passed. One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed. It faced a blank wall.

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."

--------------------

Epilogue: There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy.

"Today is a gift, that's why it is called the present."

The origin of this letter is unknown, but it brings good luck to everyone who passes it on.

Do not keep this letter. Do not send money. Just forward it to your friends to whom you wish good luck. You will see that something good happens to you four days from today. People will forget what you said... People will forget what you did... But people will never forget how you made them feel...

Make someone happy, share a kind word today.

==================================================

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet.
-- James Oppenheim

The Success' Secret

2008-12-16T01:00:00.000-08:00

During a meeting of top salespeople from around the country, the 'big cheese' himself, a man who'd consistently had the highest sales figures for the last 20 years, and who earned more money than even the owner of his company, got up to speak.

"I am now going to reveal the secret of my success," he said. "I wrote it down on a piece of paper and I put it in this envelope. But success must be earned. So I'm going to sell the envelope to the highest bidder. You have my word that it contains what I said - the Secret of my Success, not only as a salesman, but also in life."

The bidding started slowly... $5, then $10, then $50, $100, $130, $150, $200. Finally one of his colleagues bought the envelope for $1000. The happy buyer took the envelope and kept it to himself until he got home that night. Only then did he open it to learn THE SECRET OF SUCCESS.

What do you think was written on the piece of paper?

Think about it. Make a mental note of whatever comes to mind before reading the answer. Because I am going to tell you what it was later in this e-mail. And in my opinion what was written on that piece of paper is worth much more than $1000.

Learn to accept

2008-12-14T01:00:00.000-08:00

Be grateful to the person that love us that much!! No one is perfect!!

Meaningful ~ Learn 2 accepts him/her way he/she is!!!

A man and his girlfriend were married. It was a large celebration. All of their friends and family came to see the lovely ceremony and to partake of the activities and celebrations. A wonderful time was had by all. The bride was gorgeous in her white wedding gown and the groom was very dashing in his black tuxedo. Everyone could tell that the love they had for each other was true.

A few months later, the wife comes to the husband with a proposal: I read in a magazine, a while ago, about how we can strengthen our marriage." she offered. "Each of us will write a list of the things that we find a bit annoying with the other person. Then, we can talk about how we can fix them together and make our lives happier together." The husband agreed. So each of them went to a separate room in the house and thought of the things that annoyed them about the other. They thought about this question for the rest of the day and wrote down what they came up with.

The next morning, at the breakfast table, they decided that they would go over their lists. "I'll start," offered the wife. She took out her list. It had many items on it. Enough to fill 3 pages, in fact. As she started reading the list of the little annoyances, she noticed that tears were starting to appear in her husband's eyes.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing" the husband replied, "keeps reading your list." The wife continued to read until she had read all three pages to her husband. She neatly placed her list on the table and folded her hands over top of it. "Now, you read your list and then we'll talk about the things on both of our lists." She said happily.

Quietly the husband stated, "I don't have anything on my list. I think that you are perfect the way that you are. I don't want you to change anything for me. You are lovely and wonderful and I wouldn't want to try and change anything about you."

The wife, touched by his honesty and the depth of his love for her and his acceptance of her, turned her head and wept.

In life, there are enough times when we are disappointed, depressed and annoyed. We don't really have to go looking for them. We have a wonderful world that is full of beauty, light and promise. Why waste time in this world looking for the bad, disappointing or annoying when we can look around us, and see the wondrous things before us? I believe that we are happiest when we see and praise the good and try our best to forget the bad.

It's true that we should accept the other party for who they are. Cause isn't who they are in the 1st place that makes us fall in love with them?

Even if u want to change. Change it for yourself, dun feel that you're changing for others cause one day u would feel annoyed n wonder why are u doing all this n this will strain your relationship.

The Parable of the Hare and the Hedgehog

2008-12-03T01:00:00.000-08:00

One day the hedgehog challenged the hare to have race with him.

The hare, being sure of his victory, accepted the challenge without hesitation.

The race started at the entrance to the vineyard. After they started, the hare ran fast, while the hedgehog, snouting in the air, took his time and loitered along the boundaries.

Surprise!When the hare, totally exhausted, appeared at the end of the vineyard, the hedgehog was already there. "I was waiting for you. You have taken lot of time."

The hare, too proud to concede victory, proposed a return match. Again, when he crossed the finish line at the end of the field, the hedgehog, not at all breathless, waited.

The score never changed. The hedgehog was always at the finish line before the hare.

The hare, exhausted by these races, couldn't understood why his competitor did not seem to be affected by the races. The solution to the mystery was obvious; the hedgehog had a twin who waited at the other end of the vineyard.

The hare, however, was not a fool. He asked the tricky hedgehog whether, during the race, he had seen the vine stocks heavy with fruits, the shining dews on the leaves, the rays of evening light across the rows, the warm smell coming out of the perspiring earth, the patient climbing of the snell on the vine plant.

The hedgehog, a little embarrassed, replied, "What really matters is that I reached the finish line before you. Is that not true?"

The hare retorted, "What matters to me is having made a fine journey, full of discoveries and benefiting from the experience. You cheated, and you deprived yourself of the scenery of nature.

I am not convinced whether, in the end, you really won."

.................................................................

This small tale could be nothing but a joke, but every parable has its moral: it is not the question of becoming first and knowing everything in advance.

It is also necessary to be actually on the route. The theoretical knowledge is not always the best; one should also face the reality, pass through the fire of the things.

Nothing can replace personal experience.

.................................................................

"One of the finest experiences of life is walking with somebody in nature, participating in everything and at the same time in nothing".
- Christian Bobin.

The Power of Shifting Focus

2008-12-02T01:00:00.000-08:00

One day Dr Milton Erickson's young son, Robert, fell on the sidewalk out side their home. He cut his mouth and was bleeding heavily when his parents arrived on the scene, alerted by his cries of pain and fear.

Erickson immediately said, "Robert, it hurts. It hurts real bad. Real bad. I wonder when it's going to stop hurting. Right now it hurts; it just hurts. When is it going to stop hurting?" This caught Robert's attention.

At first, he was only attending to the pain, but now he also began wondering when the pain would stop. He stopped crying as he wondered about that. By that time, his parents had gotten him to the bathroom, where they were washing his mouth so Erickson could determine whether or not stitches would be required. As the blood ran from Robert's mouth into the sink, Erickson said to his wife. "Look at that blood, Mother. That's good red healthy blood! That'll clean that wound out really well. Look at the color of that blood."

Of course, Robert was also looking at the blood. Instead of being captured by his pain and fear, he was fascinated attending to his "good red healthy blood." After the wound was washed out, it became clear that Robert would need stitches.

So Erickson began to tell Robert that he needed stitches and reminded him that his brother had gotten stitches last year when he had been hurt. "I wonder whether you are going to win the stitches contest, Robert, and get more than your brother got. He had six stitches. All you would need is seven to win the contest."

When they arrived at the emergency room, the attending physician was amazed at how quietly this young boy sat while he was being cleaned and stitched up. All Robert said through his stitched-up mouth at the end of the procedure was "How many stitches did I get?" "Nine," he was told. And he gave a lopsided smile through the wound.

That is the power of changing your attention.

-- Bill O'hanlon, from his wonderful book Do One Thing Different

Be Contented

2008-12-01T01:00:00.000-08:00

Must read!! A very meaningful story.

=============================

We do not know when are we going to cry, ...so smile now! I hope everybody will feel more contented and fortunate in life after reading this story.

I wonder if any of you ever have the feeling that life is bad, real bad, and you wish you were in another situation. I admit I did pretty often. I find life make things difficult for me, work sucks, life sucks, everything seem to go wrong...it was not until yesterday that I totally changed my views about life.

After a conversation with one of my friends, he told me despite taking 2 jobs, he brings back barely above 1K per month, he is happy as he is. I wonder how he can be as happy as he is considering he has to skimp his life with the low pay to support a pair of old parents, in-laws, a wife, 2 daughters and the many bills of a household.

He explained that it was through one incident that he saw in India... that happened a few years ago when he was really feeling low and touring India after a major setback. He said that right in front of his very eyes, he saw an Indian mother chop off her child's right hand with a chopper. The helplessness in the mother's eyes, the scream of pain! from the innocent 4 year old child haunted him until today. You may ask why did the mother do so, has the child been naughty, has the child's hand been infected?? No, it was done for two simple words - - - TO BEG! The desperate mother deliberately caused the child to be handicapped so that the child can go out to the streets to beg. I cannot accept how this could happen, but it really did, just in another part of the world which I don't see.

Taken aback by the scene, he dropped a piece of bread he was eating half-way. And almost instantly, a flock 5 or 6 children swamped towards this small piece of bread which was covered with sand, robbing bits from one another. The natural reaction of hunger.

Stricken by the happenings, he instructed his guide to drive him to the nearest bakery. He arrived at two bakeries and bought every single loaf of bread he found in the bakeries. The owner was dumbfounded but willingly sold everything. He spent less than $100 to obtain about 400 loaves of bread (this is less than $0.25 per loaf) and spent another $100 to get daily necessities. Off he went in the truck full of bread into the streets. As he distributed the bread and necessities to the children (mostly handicapped) and a few adults, he received cheers and bows from these unfortunate. For the first time in his life he wondered how people can give up their dignity for a loaf of bread which cost less than $0.25.

He began to ask himself how fortunate he is. How fortunate he is to be able to have a complete body, have a job, have a family, have the chance to complain what food is nice and what isn't, have the chance to be clothed, have the many things that these people in front of him are deprived of...

Now I begin to think and feel it, too! Was my life really that bad? Perhaps...no I should not feel bad at all...What about you? Maybe the next time you think you are, think about the child who lost one hand to beg on the streets.

"Contentment is not the fulfilment of what you want, it is the realization of how much you already have."

How To Recognize A Good Woman

2008-11-30T01:00:00.000-08:00

A good woman is proud.
She respects herself and others.
She is aware of who she is.
She neither seeks definition from the person she is with, nor does she expect them to read her mind.
She is quite capable of articulating her needs.

A good woman is hopeful.
She is strong enough to make all her dreams come true.
She knows love, therefore she gives love.
She recognizes that her love has great value and must be reciprocated.
If her love is taken for granted, it soon disappears.

A good woman has a dash of inspiration and a dabble of endurance.
She knows that she will at times have to inspire others to reach the potential God gave them.

A good woman knows her past, understands her present and forges toward the future.

A good woman knows God.
She knows that with God the world is her playground, but without God she will just be played with.

A good woman does not live in fear of the future because of her past.
Instead, she understands that her life experiences are merely lessons meant to bring her closer to self-knowledge an unconditional self-love...

Beauty of a Woman

2008-11-29T01:00:00.000-08:00

Did you know that it's Beautiful Women Month? Well, it is and that means you and me.

Did you know that if shop mannequins were real women they'd be too thin to menstruate? There are 3 billion women who don't look like supermodels and only eight who do. Marilyn Monroe wore a size 14. If Barbie was a real woman, she'd have to walk on all fours due to her proportions.

The average woman weighs 144 lb, and wears between a 12-14. One out of every four college aged women has an eating disorder. The models in the magazines are airbrushed-not perfect! A psychological study in 1995 found that three minutes spent looking at a fashion magazine caused 70% of women to feel depressed, guilty, and shameful. Models twenty years ago weighed 8% less then the average woman. Today they weigh 23% less.

Beauty of a Woman

The beauty of a woman
Is not in the clothes she wears
The figure she carries
Or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman
Must be seen from her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman,
Is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman
Is reflected in her soul.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
The passion that she shows,
The beauty of a woman
With passing years-only grows.

Please send this to five phenomenal women today in celebration of Women's History Month. If you do, something good will happen - You will boost another woman's self-esteem.

The Greatest Asset of Life

2008-11-28T01:00:00.000-08:00

I am the vital principle of life -- the greatest of all success and happiness assets.

I am that which gives the plus quality to human beings. I put pep, ginger, vim, into human effort.

I am the source of physical and mental power. I give the body vigor and buoyancy, the brain vital energy and originality.

I am your best friend... the friend of the high and lowly, the rich and the poor alike but, be he king or beggar, who violates my laws must pay the penalty.

I am often sought in vain by the man who rides in his limousine, but am generally found in the company of the man who walks to his work and takes plenty of exercise.

I am the great multiplier of ability, the buttress of initiative, of courage, of self-confidence, the backbone of enthusiasm, without which nothing worth while was ever accomplished.

I am the greatest constructive power in the life of man. Without me his faith weakens, his ambition sags, his ardor oozes out, his courage faints, his self-confidence departs, his accomplishment is nil.

Without me wealth is a mockery, a palatial home a bitter disappointment.

Next to life itself, I am the greatest gift ever given to man: the millionaire who has lost me in piling up his fortune would give all his millions to get me back again.

I am that which gives buoyancy to life, which makes you magnetic, joyous, forceful, which brings out your resourcefulness and inventiveness, that which raises efficiency to its maximum and enables you to make the most of your ability.

I increase every one of your 40 or 50 mental faculties a hundredfold. I am the leader of them all. When I am present they are up, at their best; when I am absent, they are down, at their worst.

I am the friend of progress, the stimulator of ambition, the encourager of effort, the great essential to efficiency, to success, the promoter of long life and happiness.

I am a joy bringer. Where I go, good cheer goes. Where I am not, depression, discouragement, the "blues," are present. My absence means declining powers, often thwarted ambition, blighted hopes, mediocrity, failure, a shortened life.

The wise man guards me as the apple of his eye; the fool often abuses and loses me through ignorance, indifference or neglect.

by www.positive-club.com

The Phoenix and the cucumber tree

2008-11-27T20:13:00.001-08:00

Once upon a time there were two brothers, Tham and Hien. They had scarcely reached adolescence when their parents died leaving the two brothers the ancestral home - a large but simple house, a few fields and also a small parcel of forest land with a small hut.

Tham was greedy, miserly and proud. Hien was good, obliging and generous. When the two brothers thought of marrying, Tham looked for the richest possible bride whereas Hien followed his heart and looked for a sweet and loving partner. Immediately following the marriages Tham came to see his brother and told him:

"Now that we are both married, the house is too small for all of us. Since I am the eldest, it is only natural that the house should come to me. But I am not ungenerous, I don't expect you to leave empty-handed. You can have the small hut and the patch of forest land surrounding it. You are a worker, you can easily repair the hut and cultivate your land". Hien bowed his head in agreement and went to tell his wife.

The small hut was in a pitiable condition and the tiny plot of land was hard and rocky.

The only redeeming feature was a majestic cucumber-tree at one end of the field, still full of vigour despite its age. Its leaves provided shade for the hut, and seeing this Hien thought that perhaps the Gods had not completely abandoned him.

Hien and his wife worked very hard but what they were able to earn from the land was not sufficient to support them. On top of this, the young lady was expecting their first child.

One day when Hien was in a sad mood his wife calmed him. She led him outside the hut.

"Look at the cucumber tree", she said, "It is bending with the burden of its fruits. Soon I'll be able to pick them and sell them in the village. Don't give up hope".

But the next day when Hien started out for the forest he saw a very large bird with feathers of fire sitting in the tree and eating the cucumbers.

"Good bird, please have pity on us. The cucumbers are all that we have. If you eat them all, there will be nothing left for us!"

Hien did not know that the beautiful bird was the legendary Phoenix, so he was very much surprised when the bird turned and replied:

"I shall not be ungrateful and you will be greatly compensated for allowing me to taste these cucumbers. Ask your wife to sew a sack and come and see me tomorrow morning under the cucumber-tree".

The next day Hien waited under the cucumber-tree with the sack in his hand. He heard a fluttering of feathers over head and saw that the Phoenix was once again feasting on the cucumbers. Eventually the bird saw him:

"Open your sack and put it under the tree". Hien did so. As the bird ate the fruits, it dropped the equivalent weight of precious stones, diamonds and nuggets of gold into the sack.

Even before the sack was full Hien cautioned the Phoenix:

"Stop beautiful bird! I've already got more than enough to give us a good living. I thank you. You have been very good to us.”

The Phoenix understood the wisdom of the young farmer and told him:

"If misery again strikes at your door, look at this cucumber-tree and remember that you need not despair, that there will always be a solution; and if you are in need of me I shall not be far away".

............................................

This popular story hides a great truth: wealth is not just about having lots of money - it is also about the potential and possibilities of finding our own strengths: our imagination, our intelligence and creativity. Certainly the cucumber-tree and the Phoenix are proverbial, but the good bird didn't consider it worthwhile to speak to the wicked brother.

He spoke to Hien. This signifies that luck smiles on those who are enterprising, courageous, who have perseverance and confidence in their capacity to succeed and who do not give up the responsibility of their life by blaming it on fate or destiny.

............................................

"There are two types of people on earth: those who look for ways of succeeding and those who look for excuses for their failures".
M. de Cornouardt

"To have the courage of undertaking something is one of the principal factors of success".
James A. Worsham

Time Out

2008-11-27T01:00:00.000-08:00

He was the president of a major advertising firm and I was a very young management consultant. I had been recommended to him by one of his employees who had seen my work and thought I had something to offer. I was nervous. At that stage in my career, it wasn’t very often that I got to talk to the president of a company.

The appointment was at 10:00 a.m., for one hour. I arrived early.

Promptly at 10, I was ushered into a large and airy room, with furniture upholstered in bright yellow.

He had his shirtsleeves rolled up and a mean look on his face.

"You’ve only got 20 minutes," he barked.

I sat there, not saying a word.

"I said, you’ve only got 20 minutes."

Again, not a word.

"Your time’s ticking away. Why aren’t you saying anything?"

"They’re my 20 minutes," I replied. "I can do whatever I want with them."

He burst into laughter.

We then spoke for an hour and a half. I got the job.

By Martin Rutte
from Chicken Soup for the Soul at Work
Copyright 1996 by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Maida Rogerson, Martin Rutte & Tim Clauss

Wealth is All in One's Point of View

2008-11-26T01:00:00.000-08:00

One day...a wealthy family man took his son on a trip to the country so he could have his son see how poor country people were..

They stayed one day and one night in the farm of a very humble farm house. At the end of the trip and back home the father asked the son:
What did you think of the trip?

The son replied: Very nice Dad

Father: Did you noticed how poor they were?

Son: Yes

Father: What did you learn?

Son: I learned that we have one dog in the house...and they have four. We have a fountain in the garden and they have a stream that has no end.

We have imported lamps in the garden, they have the stars. Our garden goes to the edge of our property, they have the entire horizon as their back yard.

At the end of the son's reply the father was speechless and his son added: "Thank you dad for showing me how poor we really are."

Isn't it true that all depends on the crystal you use to see life?

Because it's... LOVE

2008-11-25T01:00:00.000-08:00

In front of the person you love your heart beats faster
But in front of the person you like you get happy.
In front of the person you love winter seems like spring
But in front of the person you like winter is just beautiful winter.
If you look into the eyes of the one you love you blush
But if you look into the eyes of the one you like you smile.
In front of the person you love you can't say everything on your mind.
But in front of the person you like you can.
In front of the person you love you tend to get shy
But in front of the person you like you can show your own self.
The person you love comes into your mind every 2 minutes
You can't look straight into the eyes of the one you love
But you can always smile into the eyes of the one you like.
When the one you love is crying you cry with them
But when the one you like is crying you end up comforting.
he feeling of love starts from the eye
And the feeling of like starts from the ear.
So if you stop liking a person you used to like
All you need to do is cover your ears,
But if you try to close your eyes
Love turns into a drop of tear and remains in your heart forever after.

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing
And is your voice caught within your chest?
It isn't love, it's like.

You can't keep your eyes or hands off of them, am I right?
It isn't love, it's lust.

Are you proud, and eager to show them off?
It isn't love, it's luck.

Do you want them because you know they're there?
It isn't love, it's loneliness.

Are you there because it's what everyone wants?
It isn't love, it's loyalty.

Does your heart ache and break when they're sad?
Then it's love.

Do you cry for their pain, even when they're strong?
Then it's love.

Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts?
Then it's love.

Do you stay for their confessions of love, because you don't want to hurt them?
It isn't love, it's pity.

Are you there because they kissed you, or held your hand?
It isn't love, it's unconfidence.

Do you belong to them because their sight makes your heart skip beat?
It isn't love, it's infatuation.

But do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and elation pulls you close and holds you?
Then it's love.

Do you pardon their faults because you care about them?
It isn't love, it's friendship

Do you accept their faults because they're a part of who they are?
Then it's love.

Do you tell them every day they are the only one you think of?
It isn't love, it's a lie.

Are you attracted to others, but stay with them faithfully without regret?
Then it's love.

Are you willing to give all of your favorite things for their sake?
It isn't love, it's charity.

Would you give them your heart, your life, your death?
Then it's love.

Now, if love is painful, and tortures us so, why do we love?
Why is it all we search for in life?
This pain, this agony?
Why is it all we long for?
This torture, this powerful death of self?
Why?

Because it's...
LOVE.

As a man Soweth

2008-11-24T01:00:00.000-08:00

When I was in junior high, the eighth-grade bully punched me in the stomach. Not only did it hurt and make me angry, but the embarrassment and humiliation were almost intolerable. I wanted desperately to even the score! I planned to meet him by the bike racks the next day and let him have it.

For some reason, I told my plan to Nana, my grandmother - big mistake. She gave me one of her hour-long lectures (that woman could really talk). The lecture was a total drag, but among other things, I vaguely remember her telling me that I didn’t need to worry about him. She said, "Good deeds beget good results, and evil deeds beget bad results." I told her, in a nice way, of course, that I thought she was full of it. I told her that I did good things all the time, and all I got in return was "baloney!" (I didn’t use that word.) She stuck to her guns, though. She said, "Every good deed will come back to you someday, and every bad thing you do will also come back to you."

It took me 30 years to understand the wisdom of her words. Nana was living in a board-and-care home in Laguna Hills, California. Each Tuesday, I came by and took her out to dinner. I would always find her neatly dressed and sitting in a chair right by the front door. I vividly remember our very last dinner together before she went into the convalescent hospital. We drove to a nearby simple little family-owned restaurant. I ordered pot roast for Nana and a hamburger for myself. The food arrived and as I dug in, I noticed that Nana wasn’t eating. She was just staring at the food on her plate. Moving my plate aside, I took Nana’s plate, placed it in front of me, and cut her meat into small pieces. I then placed the plate back in front of her. As she very weakly, and with great difficulty, forked the meat into her mouth, I was struck with a memory that brought instant tears to my eyes. Forty years previously, as a little boy sitting at the table. Nana had always taken the meat on my plate and cut it into small pieces so I could eat it.

It had taken 40 years, but the good deed had been repaid. Nana was right. We reap exactly what we sow. "Every good deed you do will someday come back to you."

What about the eighth-grade bully?

He ran into the ninth-grade bully.

By Mike Buetelle

from A 2nd Helping of Chicken Soup for the Soul
Copyright 1995 by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen

What is the Difference

2008-11-23T01:00:00.000-08:00

A young black boy saw a balloon seller on a street corner. His eyes sparkled as he gazed at all the different colored balloons - red, blue, white, black, yellow...

The old man selling the balloons saw the boy hesitate, then gather his courage and approach.

"Tell me mister," said the boy, "Do the black balloons fly as high as the others?"

The old man felt a tear forming in his eye. He picked the boy up, sat him on his knee and said, "Look."

He let go of all the balloons. They drifted up in a cluster, higher and higher into the blue sky, until they were so high they disappeared.

"Did you see that?" the balloon seller asked.

"Yes," said the boy.

"Did the black balloons fly as high as the others?"

"Yes, Mister, they did."

"You see my boy, the balloons are like people. The important thing isn't their color, or what they look like on the outside. No, the important thing is WHAT'S INSIDE.

And what's inside you makes all the difference in life."

...............................................................

"When someone's character seems impossible to fathom, observe his friends."
Japanese proverb

What goes round, comes around

2008-11-22T01:00:00.000-08:00

He almost didn't see the old lady, stranded on the side of the road. But even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out. His Pontiac was still sputtering when he approached her. Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped to help for the last hour or so ... was he going to hurt her?

He didn't look safe, he looked poor and hungry. He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold. He knew how she felt. It was that chill which only fear can put in you. He said, "I'm here to help you ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan."

Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old lady, that was bad enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack, skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt. As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was only just
passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to her aid. Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk. She asked him how much she owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her. She already imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not stopped. Bryan never thought twice about the money. This was not a job to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were plenty who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way. He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the assistance they needed, and Bryan added, "... and think of me."

He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing into the twilight.

A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The cash register was like the telephone of an out-of-work actor—it didn't ring much.

Her waitress came over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn't erase. The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she never let the strain and aches change her attitude.

The old lady wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger. Then she remembered Bryan. After the lady finished her meal, and the waitress went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, the lady slipped right out the door.

She was gone by the time the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be, then she noticed something written on the napkin under which was four $100 bills. There were tears in her eyes when she read what the lady wrote : You don't owe me anything, I have been there too.
Somebody once helped me out, the way I'm helping you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let this chain of love end with you."

Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to serve, but the waitress made it through another day.

That night when she got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how much she and her husband needed it?

With the baby due next month, it was going to be hard. She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to her, she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low, "Everything's gonna be all right; I love you, Bryan."

There is an old saying "What goes around comes around." Today, I sent you this story, and I'm asking you to pass it on ... Let this light shine. Don't put it under a basket. Please pass this on to a friend. "Throw your dreams into space like a kite, and you do not know what it will bring back, a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country."

Take time to appreciate what you have now

2008-11-21T01:00:00.000-08:00

A good reminder: take time to appreciate what you have now.

On the last day before Christmas, I hurried to go to the supermarket to buy the gifts I didn't manage to buy earlier. When I saw all the people there, I started to complain to myself: 'It is going to take forever here and I still have so many other places to go...'

Christmas really is getting more and more annoying every year. How I wish I could just lie down, go to sleep and only wake up after it was over. I started to curse the prices, wondering if kids really play with such expensive toys. While looking in the toy section, I noticed a small boy of about 5 years old pressing a doll against his chest. He kept on touching the hair of the doll and looked so sad. I wondered who this doll was for. Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: 'Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?' The old lady replied: 'You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.' Then she
asked him to stay here for 5 minutes while she went to look around. She left quickly.

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I started to walk towards him and asked who he wanted to give this doll to. 'It is the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for this Christmas. She was so sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.' I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus will bring it to her, after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can not bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mother so that she can give it to her when she goes there.' His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy say that Mummy will also go to see God very soon, so I thought that she could bring the doll with her to give it to my sister'. My heart nearly stopped.

The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mummy not to go yet. I asked him to wait until I come back from the supermarket' Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me: 'I also want mummy to take this photo with her so that she will not forget me.' 'I love my mummy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister' Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and took a few bills and said to the boy. What if we checked again, just in case if u have enough money?' 'Ok' he said. 'I hope that I have enough.' I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll, and even some spare money. The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money' then he looked at me and added: 'I asked yesterday before I slept for God to make sure I have enough money to buy this doll so that mummy can give it to my sister. He heard me' 'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mummy, but I didn't dare to ask God too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and the white rose.' 'You know, my mummy loves white roses. A few minutes later, the old lady came again and I left with my trolley. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article 2 days ago, which mentioned of a drunk man in a truck who hit a car where there was one young lady and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-assisting machine, because the young lady would not be able to get out of the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?

Two days after this encounter with the little boy in mind, I read in the newspaper that the young lady had passed away.I couldn't stop myself and went to buy a bunch of white roses and I went to the mortuary where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wish before burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place crying, feeling that my life had been changed forever. The love that this little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to that day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk man had taken all this away from him.

Room for improvement

2008-11-20T01:00:00.000-08:00

Although life is far from perfect, it is completely abundant and very much worth every moment of living. Yes, there are always things that could be improved, and that is a blessing in itself. For it means that you are alive and able to make things happen. It means that there is always the option of reaching ever higher.

There is always room for improvement, and that means there is always room to grow. Weaknesses can be transformed into strengths, and liabilities can be changed into assets.
Where there is room for improvement, there are also the seeds of opportunity and accomplishment. Businesses, careers and entire industries are built on the need and desire for continuing, expanding improvement.

When there is something that needs to be improved, learn to see it not as a deficiency. See it for what it is, which is a magnificent opportunity. If there is room for improvement, there is the real possibility of greatness.

-- Ralph Marston

Choose How You Start Your Day Tomorrow

2008-11-19T01:00:00.000-08:00

Michael is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!" He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Michael was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation. Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to.

Michael and asked him, "I don't get it! You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?" Michael replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or ... you can choose to be in a bad mood. I choose to be in a good mood.

Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life. "Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested. "Yes, it is," Michael said.

"Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life." I reflected on what Michael said. Soon thereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when

I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it. Several years later, I heard that Michael was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Michael was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back. I saw Michael about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied. "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Want to see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.

"The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon to be born daughter, "Michael replied. "Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or ...I could choose to die. I chose to live. "Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked. Michael continued, "...the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read "he's a dead man. I knew I needed to take action." "What did you do?" I asked.

"Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said Michael. "She asked if I was allergic to anything. "Yes, I replied." The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, "Gravity." Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead."

Michael lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

I wish you enough

2008-11-18T01:00:00.000-08:00

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter's departure had been announced. Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said, "I love you and I wish you enough."

The daughter replied, "Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom." They kissed and the daughter left. The mother walked over to the window where I sat. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, "Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?"

"Yes, I have," I replied. "Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?"

"I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral," she said.

When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, "I wish you enough." May I ask what that means?"

She began to smile. "That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone." She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more. "When we said 'I wish you enough' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them".

Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough helloes to get you through the final good-bye.

She then began to cry and walked away.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person,
An hour to appreciate them,
A day to love them,
And an entire life to forget them.
Send this to the people you will never forget.

TAKE TIME TO LIVE!
To all my friends and loved ones,
I WISH YOU ENOUGH!

Thoughts to Keep

2008-11-17T01:00:00.000-08:00

* Falling in love with the Lord is the greatest romance; searching Him, the greatest adventure; finding him, the greatest achievement; and being with Him, the greatest source of happiness.

* Five Rules to be happy:
1) Free your heart from hatred,
2) Free your mind from worry,
3) Live simply,
4) Expect less and
5) Give more

* The real test of true love is having all the things go wrong but still having a special way to love despite of all the wrong things that may happen.

* Always take a CHANCE. The end result may not always be what you hoped for but that's fine... At least, you will never go through life wondering "What if... and "If only...."

* Hold a friend's hand through times of trial, let him/her find love through a hug and a smile... But also know when it is time to let go, for each and everyone of us must learn to grow.

* Love is not a word to say when we feel guilty nor the right word to say when we like a person... But LOVE really matters when we share our thoughts, our minds and our hearts.

* A soul mate is someone who brings out the best in you... They are not perfect but is always perfect for you.

* Never whisper words of love if the feeling is not true...Never share your feeling if you mean to break a heart... Never look into my eyes if all you have to do is lie... and never say hello if you really mean goodbye...

* Genuine friendship is not measured by time... but it is measured by acceptance... A friend is one where even though you reflect the silver, he/she sees the GOLD.

* It takes 3 sec. to say "I love you", 3 mins. to explain it, 3 hrs. to demonstrate it, 3 days to appreciate it, 3 trimester to produce it... but a LIFETIME to prove it.

Wealth, Success & Love

2008-11-16T07:30:00.000-08:00

A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said "I don't think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat."

"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.

"No", she replied. "He's out."

"Then we cannot come in", they replied.

In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.

"Go tell them I am home and invite them in!"

The woman went out and invited the men in"

"We do not go into a House together," they replied.

"Why is that?" she asked.

One of the old men explained: "His name is Wealth," he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, "He is Success, and I am Love." Then he added, "Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home."

The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. "How nice!!", he said. "Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!"

His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"

Their daughter-in-law was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: "Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!"

"Let us heed our daughter-in-law's advice," said the husband to his wife.

"Go out and invite Love to be our guest."

The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, "Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest."

Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other 2 also got up and followed him. Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success: "I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?"

The old men replied together: "If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would've stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!"

MY WISH FOR YOU...
-Where there is pain, I wish you peace and mercy.
-Where there is self-doubting, I wish you a renewed confidence in your ability to work through it.
-Where there is tiredness, or exhaustion, I wish you understanding, patience, and renewed strength.
-Where there is fear, I wish you love, and courage.

You are

2008-11-16T01:00:00.000-08:00

You are strong when you take your grief and teach it to smile.
You are brave when you overcome your fear and help others to do the same.
You are happy when you see a flower and give it your blessing.
You are loving when your own pain does not blind you to the pain of others.
You are wise when you know the limits of your wisdom.
You are true when you admit there are times you fool yourself.
You are alive when tomorrow's hope means more to you than yesterday's mistake.
You are growing when you know what you are but not what you will become.
You are free when you are in control of yourself and do not wish to control others.
You are honorable when you find your honor is to honor others.
You are generous when you can take as sweetly as you can give.
You are humble when you do not know how humble you are.
You are thoughtful when you see me just as I am and treat me just as you are.
You are merciful when you forgive in others the faults you condemn in yourself.
You are beautiful when you don't need a mirror to tell you.
You are rich when you never need more than what you have.
You are you when you see beyond who you are not.

World Is Like A Net

2008-11-15T01:00:00.000-08:00

OBSERVATION
An old proverb says that "The world is a net; the more we stir in it, the more we are entangled."

EXCHANGED VALUES
Max Lucado, a prominent author and minister, tells this story about a prank that occurred years ago:

It seems a couple of prowlers broke into a department store in a large city. They successfully entered the store, stayed long enough to do what they came to do, and escaped unnoticed. What is unusual about the story is what these fellows did. They took nothing. Absolutely nothing. No merchandise was stolen. No items were removed. But what they did do was ridiculous.

Instead of stealing anything, they changed the cost of everything. Price are swapped. Values were exchanged. These clever pranksters took the tag off a $395.00 camera and stuck it on a $5.00 box of stationery. The $5.95 sticker on a paperback book was removed and placed on an outboard motor. They repriced everything in the store!

Crazy? You bet. But the craziest part of this story took place the next morning. The store opened as usual. Employees went to work. Customers began to shop. The place functioned as normal for four hours before anyone noticed what had happened.

Four hours! Some people got some great bargains. Others got fleeced. For four solid hours no one noticed that the values had been swapped.

HOW DOES THIS APPLY TO OUR LIVES?
As price tags were exchanged, valuable goods became cheap, and the cheap became valuable. This can happen to us. We exchange things that are important for those that, in comparison, are unimportant---- the world honors success and hard work, so we devote ourselves to jobs we can't wait to retire from, while ignoring marriages that we entered in to for a lifetime;

- we seek clean, healthy homes, but let them become dumping grounds for the pollution contained in some television programs, movies and popular music; and,

- we want our children to have strong character traits like honesty and integrity, but spend far more time taking them to athletic events and other activities than tending to their spiritual and moral needs.

Yes, the world is a net; the more we stir in it, the more we are entangled. Seeking "happiness" and acceptance, we buy into the world's values and do what is popular. But if the world's values can produce true happiness, why is there a constant effort to create and promote new forms of amusement and entertainment?

Focus your time and attention on what is valuable to you. While doing so, put your spiritual needs at the top of the list. Nothing should come before your relationship with a man named Jesus. Even though he was dead, he is now alive, seated at the right hand of the throne of God. He understands, He knows, he cares. And he nourishes those who seek to be fed.

As Erwin Lutzer observed ...

if you are not nourished by the Bread from heaven, you will stuff yourself with crumbs from the world. Real nourishment comes only from Jesus Christ. You'll be eternally sorry if you exchange real nourishment for crumbs.

"What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?"

We owe a lot to our parents

2008-11-14T01:00:00.000-08:00

On Mother's Day and Father's Day, we send our parents cards and flowers and gifts. We tell them we appreciate them, we tell them we love them. Then we spend the rest of the year trying to avoid them. Well, some of us try harder than others.

According to two recent polls, 36% of elderly parents say their grown children have failed to help them in a time of need in the past five years. And that doesn't even include all those parents who can't remember. Perhaps poor memory is a good thing. If I'm ever an aging parent, I want
to remember my children as the most loving and caring people. And if they're not, I want to forget.

But the only thing I'll probably forget is to put them in my will. Let's face it: Parents can be a pain at times. They expect so much out of you. Do this, do that, eat this, eat that, marry this, marry that. There's no satisfying them.

But you have to overlook your entire childhood to turn your back on your parents. There are so many reasons to be grateful to them. Here are just a few:

---They didn't abort you.
Yes, some of them easily could have, but they chose to accept at least 18 years of responsibility. Sure, you brought them lots of joy, but you also brought them lots of migraines. Thanks to you, they had to invest more money in aspirin than in the stock market.

---They changed your diaper about 2,750 times.
You may have many talents today, but for the first years of your life, your only talent was soiling a diaper. Soon after that, you developed another talent: wetting the bed. You were so good at that, they thought you'd do it for the rest of your life.

---They forced you to do your homework.
You preferred to watch cartoons on television, but they knew you couldn't make a career out of that. Unless you ended up on welfare. They encouraged you to earn good grades and graduate from school. They didn't want you to sell drugs for a living, without going to pharmacy school.

---They lost so much sleep worrying about you, they haven't yet caught up.
That's why they have to go to bed at 7 p.m. They'd have to sleep continuously for five years to make up for your puberty alone.

---They spent a small fortune on you.
Without you, they could have vacationed every year in the Bahamas and bought a sports car-instead of that totally uncool station wagon. And they could have bought lots of fancy appliances and furniture, items that are guaranteed to never talk back or ask for allowances.

---They were so proud of you.
Why do you think they took one billion photos of you? You weren't that cute. They even snapped shots of you taking a bath, as though that was some big achievement. When you took your first step, they acted like you had walked on the moon. They wanted to tell everybody, even the mail carrier. When you spoke your first word, they wanted to put an announcement in the newspaper. They wanted to call CNN. Consider yourself lucky if you have two parents or even just one. You can't replace a parent. You can't go to the store and buy one, even if you're as loaded as Bill Gates.

Parents aren't perfect, but chances are, no one will ever love you the same way. Especially if you act the way you did.

Don't take at face value

2008-11-13T01:00:00.000-08:00

Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family. The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guest room. Instead the angels were given a space in the cold basement. As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it. When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied..."Things aren't always what they seem".

The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor but very hospitable farmer and his wife. After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night's rest. When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears. Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field.

The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel "how could you have let this happen!? The first man had everything, yet you helped him," she accused. "The second family had little but was willing to share everything and you let their cow die." "Things aren't always what they seem," the older angel replied. "When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall. Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it. Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife. I gave her the cow instead. Things aren't always what they seem."

The Gentle Art Of Blessings

2008-11-12T01:00:00.000-08:00

Your morning Irish blessing:
May the sun shine all day long,
Everything go right, and nothing wrong.
May those you love bring love back to you
And may all the wishes you wish come true!
--------------------------------------------------------
by Pierre Pradervand

On awakening, bless this day, for it is already full of unseen good which your blessings will call forth; for to bless is to acknowledge the unlimited good that is embedded in the very texture of the universe and awaiting each and all.

On passing people in the street, on the bus, in places of work and play, bless them. The peace of your blessing will accompany them on their way and the aura of its gentle fragrance will be a light to their path.

On meeting and talking to people, bless them in their health, their work, their joy, their relationships to God, themselves, and others. Bless them in their abundance, their finances...bless them in every conceivable way, for such blessings not only sow seeds of healing but one day will spring forth as flowers of joy in the waste places of your own life.

As you walk, bless the city in which you live, its government and teachers, its nurses and streetsweepers, its children and bankers, its priests and prostitutes. The minute anyone expresses the least aggression or unkindness to you, respond with a blessing: bless them totally, sincerely, joyfully, for such blessings are a shield which protects them from the ignorance of their misdeed, and deflects the arrow that was aimed at you.

To bless means to wish, unconditionally, total, unrestricted good for others and events from the deepest wellspring in the innermost chamber of your heart: it means to hallow, to hold in reverence, to behold with utter awe that which is always a gift from the Creator. He who is hallowed by your blessing is set aside, consecrated, holy, whole. To bless is yet to invoke divine care upon, to think or speak gratefully for, to confer happiness upon - although we ourselves are never the bestower, but simply the joyful witnesses of Life's abundance.

To bless all without discrimination of any sort is the ultimate form of giving, because those you bless will never know from whence came the sudden ray of sun that burst through the clouds of their skies, and you will rarely be a witness to the sunlight in their lives.

When something goes completely askew in your day, some unexpected event knocks down your plans and you too also, burst into blessing: for life is teaching you a lesson, and the very event you believe to be unwanted, you yourself called forth, so as to learn the lesson you might balk against were you not to bless it. Trials are blessings in disguise, and hosts of angels follow in their path.

To bless is to acknowledge the omnipresent, universal beauty hidden to material eyes; it is to activate that law of attraction which, from the furthest reaches of the universe,will bring into your life exactly what you need to experience and enjoy.

When you pass a prison, mentally bless its inmates in their innocence and freedom, their gentleness, pure essence and unconditional forgiveness; for one can only be prisoner of one's self-image, and a free man can walk unshackled in the courtyard of a jail, just as citizens of countries where freedom reigns can be prisoners when fear lurks in their thoughts.

When you pass a hospital, bless its patients in their present wholeness, for even in their suffering, this wholeness awaits in them to be discovered. When your eyes behold a man in tears, or seemingly broken by life, bless him in his vitality and joy: for the material senses present but the inverted image of the ultimate splendor and perfection which only the inner eye beholds.

It is impossible to bless and to judge at the same time. So hold constantly as a deep, hallowed, intoned thought that desire to bless, for truly then shall you become a peacemaker, and one day you shall, everywhere, behold the very face of God.

Gossip - Nobody's Friend

2008-11-11T01:00:00.000-08:00

My name is Gossip.
I have no respect for justice.
I aim without killing.
I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cunning and malicious
and gather strength with age.
The more I am quoted, the
more I am believed.
My victims are helpless. They
cannot protect themselves
against me because I have no
name and no face.
To track me down is impossible.
The harder you try, the
more elusive I become.
I am nobody's friend.
Once I tarnish a reputation,
it is never the same.
I topple governments
and wreck marriages.
I ruin careers
and cause sleepless nights,
heartaches,
and indigestion.
I make innocent people cry in their pillows.
Even my name hisses.
I am called Gossip.
I make headlines and headaches.
Before you repeat a story,
ask yourself:
Is it true?
Is it harmless?
Is it necessary?
If it isn't, don't repeat it.

Life is a mirror

2008-11-10T01:00:00.000-08:00

You see in it what you show in it. If you stand before the mirror and make a pleasant face, a pleasant face looks back at you. If you make an unpleasant face, an unpleasant face looks back at you. What comes to you from the mirror from inside the mirror is created by you standing outside.

Because happiness and misery, favorable environment and unfavorable environment, to a large extent depend upon our state of mind, how we look at things. HAPPINESS IS NOT CONTAINED IN THINGS, SITUATIONS OR THE ENVIRONMENT OUTSIDE. Happiness or unhappiness is in how we look at things through our mind. It is therefore, the situation within. It is the state of our mind that makes our happiness or unhappiness.

A traveler once asked a shepherd: "How do you think the weather will be today?" The shepherd answered: "It will be the weather that I like." The traveler asked: "How can you say that, how do you know it will be what you like?" The shepherd explained: "It is like this, sir: knowing that over such things such as the weather I have no control, knowing that I cannot change it, long ago I decided that whatever weather comes I will like it.

And therefore now I am at peace. Instead of always trying to get only that thing that I like, I decided that it is wiser to like whatever thing I get. So, I always like the weather I get."

The key to happiness is inside. Just as a picture does not paint itself, it must be the artist with his brush that paints it. If he dips the brush in green, he cannot expect blue to appear on the canvas: neither should he blame the brush. Whatever color he applies, that will appear to him. So too should this truth to the canvas of our lives: "I am the one who makes my day: I make my own happiness and misery: I can make either darkness or light; from within I create it."

Apply this truth and then see what happens---you will create a masterpiece.

Value of Time

2008-11-09T05:43:00.000-08:00

To realize the value of one year:
Ask a student who has failed a final exam.

To realize the value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize the value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.

To realize the value of one minute:
Ask a person who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize the value of one second:
Ask a person who has survived an accident.

To realize the value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics.

Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more
When you can share it with someone special.

Life's Optimistic Lesson

2008-11-03T01:00:00.000-08:00

There was this museum laid with beautiful marble tiles, with a huge marble statue displayed in the middle of the lobby. Many people came from all over the world just to admire this beautiful marble statue.

One night, the marble tiles started talking to the marble statue.

Marble tile: Marble statue, it's just not fair, it's just not fair! Why does everybody from all over the world come all the way here just to step on me while admiring you ? Not fair!

Marble statue: My dear friend, marble tile. Do you still remember that we were actually from the same cave?

Marble tile: Yeah! That's why I feel it is even more unfair. We were born from the same cave and yet we receive different treatment now. Not fair!"

Marble statue: Then, do you still remember the day when the designer tried to work on you, but you resisted the tools?

Marble tile: Yes, of course I remember. I hate that guy ! How could he use those tools on me, it hurt so badly.

Marble statue: That's right! He couldn't work on you at all as you resisted being worked on.

Marble tile: So???

Marble statue: When he decided to give up on you and start working on me instead, I knew at once that I would be something different after his efforts. I did not resist his tools, instead I bore all the painful tools he used on me.

Marble tile: Mmmmmm.......

Marble statue: My friend, there is a price to everything in life. Since you decided to give up half way, you can't blame anybody who steps on you now."

The moral of the story is .... ...
It simply means that the more hard knocks you go through in life, the more you'll learn and put them to use in the future !! Do not be discouraged by setbacks and failures. Past is past, you can't change it but it is actually a blessing in disguise.

Past was good, Present is better and the future will always be the best.

Life Skill #5 To motivate others taking action; Give praises

2008-10-26T01:00:00.000-07:00

There was a stingy and rich businessman. One day, he invited the local governor to his house for dinner. So he told his cook to prepare the most expensive and delicious food for his guest. During the dinner, the cook prepared Shark Fin Soup, Abalone, etc for them. The businessman was very happy until the last dish, when the Peking Duck was served. The duck had only one leg!!! The businessman was very angry and demanded the cook to give his explanation.

The cook replied, "Sir, the ducks in your house had only one leg". "That's impossible!" the businessman said. "All right, we shall go to the backyard and have a look whether the ducks have two legs or one leg."

As it was the night already and all the ducks were sleeping, they were all standing on one leg. The cook said, "Sir, see I told you, the ducks have only one leg." The businessman was not convinced, and he started to put his hands together and clap very loudly. The ducks were wakened up and started to run here and there. The businessman said, "Now you tell me, the ducks have how many legs."

The cook replied, "Sir, if you have given me the clap, I would have given you two legs too".

Everybody needs a pat on the shoulder to continue working. When was the last time, you show your appreciation to people who helped you or work for you?

Now if you have a role model (it can be a friend or famous people), who is able to score 100 points each for the above 5 characteristics, how much points do you give yourself? If you are not able to score full points, start working on it and maybe you can be somebody else's role model in future.

Life Skill #4 To overcome excessive worry and tension

2008-10-25T01:00:00.000-07:00

Long time ago in China, there was a couple with a twins. One was very positive, but the other one was very negative. During their birthday, their parents decided to give them birthday presents. For the negative child, their parents gave him lots of toys. They thought this would make him happy. As for the positive child, the parents thought that since this child was already positive, just gave him some white papers.

However, when the couple went to see their children, they were surprised to see the negative child crying. The father asked, "My dear son, why aren't you happy? You don't like the toys?" The boy replied, "You give me so many toys to play, if they are spoilt and I don't know how to repair, what should I do?" And the boy continued to cry. When the couple went to see the positive son, they were surprised to see him so happy. The mother asked her son, "My dear son, why are you so happy?" He replied, "The white papers you gave me, I can use it to fold a boat, I can also write something on it. There are so many uses for paper. Thank you very much for your present."

Do you know that it is important to overcome worries and tension? Only when you are able to do so, you are able to enjoy better relationship with people, and face greater challenges.

Life Skill #3 . To maintain the high level of enthusiasm at workplace and in daily living

2008-10-24T01:00:00.000-07:00

How many of us wake up every morning and say to ourselves, "What a good day. It's a nice good day for challenges again"? I guess not, most of us would probably want to remain in the bed, hugging our bolster. We seem like getting up from the wrong side of the bed everyday. So, what's the problem?

We add sugar to our coffee when it not bitter, we add salt when our soup is blend, we add chili when we want some spice in our food. We eat everyday and we add seasoning to our food everyday.

We work everyday, but do you add seasoning to your work everyday too? Do you know "Lack of enthusiasm will wrinkle your soul"? Spice up your life now!

Life Skill #2 To be accepted by others with ease

2008-10-23T01:00:00.000-07:00

Did you come across somebody whom simply irritates you? I went to a restaurant for dinner with my friends the other day. The food was great and I even told my friends that we can come here again the next time.

After we finished the food, I asked the waiter for the bill. I was taken back when he coldly told me, "$38". No "please", and no "thank you"! Just "$38"!!! The worst part was after that I made the payment by credit card, he threw my card and the receipts on the table, without arranging them properly. Despite my image of "Mr. Nice Guy", I became nasty. I went forward to the waiter and asked him, "Do you have a problem? What kind of attitude is this?" If the waiter had treated me better, would I need to create a big fuss?

Sometimes in our life, did we also do something that irritates people? The golden rule applies, "Put on a smile, and you make a day for all of us".

Life Skill #1 To express ourselves clearly and freely

2008-10-22T01:00:00.000-07:00

How many of us are able to say what we want, how we feel? It was late Saturday night. Henry was not home from work yet. His wife was worried. But as soon as Henry stepped through the front door, the first thing that his wife greeted him was, "Where the Hell did you go? Do you know how late it is now?!"

You can imagine how the rest of the night went, as both of them started to argue. If Henry's wife was able to express herself better and said, "Henry, where did you go? I'm so worried about you," the argument could be prevented, and their feelings could be expressed.

Now, think about yourself, when was the last time you were so over-controlled by your own feelings and emotions that you were not able to express how you actually felt? Could the situation be improved?

SMILE!!!!!

2008-10-21T01:00:00.000-07:00

She smiled at a sorrowful stranger.
The smile seemed to make him feel better.
He remembered past kindnesses of a friend
And wrote him a thank you letter.

The friend was so pleased with the thank you
That he left a large tip after lunch.
The waitress, surprised by the size of the tip,
Bet the whole thing on a hunch.

The next day she picked up her winnings,
And gave part to a man on the street.
The man on the street was grateful;
For two days he'd had nothing to eat.

After he finished his dinner,
He left for his small dingy room.
He didn't know at that moment
that he might be facing his doom.

On the way he picked up a shivering puppy
And took him home to get warm.
The puppy was very grateful
To be in out of the storm.

That night the house caught on fire.
The puppy barked the alarm.
He barked till he woke the whole household
And saved everybody from harm.

One of the boys that he rescued
Grew up to be President.
All this because of a simple smile
That hadn't cost a cent.

Ten Secrets of Love

2008-10-20T01:00:00.000-07:00

* The first secret - the power of thought.

Love begins with our thoughts. We become what we think about. Loving thoughts create loving experiences and loving relationships.

Affirmations can change our beliefs and thoughts about ourselves and others. If we want to love someone, we need to consider their needs and desires.

Thinking about your ideal partner will help you recognize her when you meet her.

* The second secret - the power of respect.

You cannot love anyone or anything unless you first respect them. The first person you need to respect is yourself.

To begin to gain self-respect ask yourself, "What do I respect about myself?" To gain respect for others, even those you may dislike, ask yourself "What do I respect about them?"

* The third secret - the power of giving.

If you want to receive love, all you have to do is give it! The more love you give, the more you will receive.

To love is to give of yourself, freely and unconditionally. Practice random acts of kindness. Before committing to a relationship ask not what the other person will be able to give to you, but rather what will you be able to give them.

The secret formula of a happy, lifelong, loving relationship is to always focus on what you can give instead of what you can take.

* The fourth secret - the power of friendship.

To find a true love, you must first find a true friend.

Love does not consist of gazing into each other's eyes, but rather looking outward together in the same direction.

To love someone completely you must love them for who they are, not what they look like. Friendship is the soil through which love's seeds grow.

If you want to bring love into a relationship, you must first bring friendship.

* The fifth secret - the power of touch.

Touch is one of the most powerful expressions of love, breaking down barriers and bonding relationships. Touch changes our physical and emotional states and makes us more receptive to love.

* The sixth secret - the power of letting go.

If you love something, let it free. If it comes back to you it's yours, if it doesn't it never was. Even in a loving relationship, people need their own space. If we want to learn to love, we must first learn to forgive and let go of past hurts and grievances. Love means letting go of our fears, prejudices, egos and conditions. "Today I let go of all my fears, the past has no power over me - today is the beginning of a new life."

* The seventh secret - the power of communication.

When we learn to communicate openly and honestly, life changes. To love someone is to communicate with them. Let the people you love know that you love them and appreciate them. Never be afraid to say those three magic words: "I Love You." Never let an opportunity pass to praise someone.

Always leave someone you love with a loving word - it could be the last time you see them. If you were about to die but could make telephone calls to the people you loved, who would you call, what would you say and ...why are you waiting?

* The eighth secret - the power of commitment.

If you want to have love in abundance, you must be committed to it, and that commmitment will be reflected in your thoughts and actions.

Commitment is the true test of love. If you want to have loving relationships, you must be committed to loving relationships. When you are committed to someone or something, quitting is never an option.

Commitment distinguishes a fragile relationship from a strong one.

* The ninth secret - the power of passion.

Passion ignites love and keeps it alive. Lasting passion does not come through physical attraction alone, it comes from deep commitment, enthusiasm, interest and excitement.

Passion can be recreated by recreating past experiences when you felt passionate. Spontaneity and surprises produce passion. The essence of love and happiness are the same; all we need to do is to live each day with passion.

* The tenth secret - the power of trust.

Trust is essential in all loving relationships. Without it one person becomes suspicious, anxious and fearful and the other person feels trapped and emotionally suffocated. You cannot love someone completely unless you trust them completely.

Act as if your relationship with the person you love will never end. One of the ways you can tell whether a person is right for you is to ask yourself, "Do I trust them completely and unreservedly?" If the answer is "no", think carefully before making a commitment.

Every Woman is Beautiful

2008-10-19T01:00:00.001-07:00

A little boy asked his mother "Why are you crying?"

"Because I'm a woman", she told him.

"I don't understand", he said.

His mum just hugged him and said, "And you never will"

Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?"

"All women cry for no reason", was all his dad could say

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to God; and when God got on the phone, he asked, "God, why do women cry so easily?"

God said:

"When I made the woman she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world; yet, gentle enough to give comfort"
"I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children"
"I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining "
"I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly"
"I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart"
"I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly"
"And finally, I gave her a tear to shed
This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed."

"You see:

The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair."
"The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides."

Every Woman is Beautiful.

Being happy can be hard work sometimes.....

2008-10-15T01:00:00.000-07:00

Being happy can be hard work sometimes. It is like maintaining a nice home - you've got to hang on to your treasures and throw out the garbage.

Being happy requires looking for the good things. One person sees the beautiful view and the other sees the dirty window. Choose what you see and what you think.

Do you recall watching "boy meet girl" movies? Titanic would be a famous example. As the boy and girl struggle through thick and thin, you hoped and prayed the whole time that everything would work out even in the outcome of imminent doom. We gulped and dried our tears as the curtains came down. We cry at these movies because at our deepest level, we care. We hurt. There is an inner core in all of us, which is simply beautiful. When we see the plight of the starving around the globe on TV, we ache for them. We all care.

Accept that you have these capacities to love and emphasize and be HUMAN. Recognize your own worth and constantly remind yourself that you deserved to be treated well!

To learn to walk, we must risk falling over. To make a dollar, we must risk losing it. In loving and caring, we risk breaking our hearts. Getting a job is a risk. Crossing the road is a risk. Starting a family is a risk. Life is a risk. Winners take more risk than losers. That is why they win so much. Necessarily then, winners lose more than losers, but they are playing so often that their wins add up. We have a choice between living and merely existing.

COMPLIMENTS
Ever notice how good you feel when you give a compliment? Even if people are awkward in receiving them, they appreciate them. When we make it a habit to GIVE genuine compliments, we'll always be looking out for the good in people.

TWO HAPPINESS TRAP
We postpone our happiness - " I'll be happy when...."(When the house is paid off, when we go to Phuket, Bali, or Hawaii, when I find a better job...) We look back to the past and say, "If I have known today was going to be so awful, I would have been happy yesterday." HAPPINESS is not a when - Happiness is a NOW.

WORK
Lots of people will tell you, "I'll be happier if my job was easier." But when work gets easier, they quit, and look for another challenge. The truth is, we love challenge. Let's stop kidding ourselves! Nearly every job is repetitious. Often, the secret to enjoying a job is not to change your job but to change your ATTITUDE.

LAW OF PROGRESS
Everything has ups and downs - nothing travels in straight lines. This applies to your own progress in any project. Keep your eye on your target; keep putting in the effort and you reach your target despite the ups and downs. Successful people realize that they reach their goals by continuously correcting. We get off course, correct, and get back on course. Ships do it. Rockets and missiles do it. Correct. Correct. Correct.

LEARNING FROM CHILDREN
Spend time with children. Learn more about laughter, spontaneity, curiosity, acceptance, resilience, trust, determination, and your imagination.

The key to happiness is not that you never get upset, frustrated or irritated. It is how quickly you decide to snap out of it. Happiness is not dependent on your circumstances or your bank balance. Happiness is a DAILY DECISION.

I hope your day is a "Piece of Cake!"

2008-10-14T07:49:00.000-07:00

Sometimes we wonder, "What did I do to deserve this?" or "Why did God have to do this to me?" Here is a wonderful explanation! A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away.

Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, "Absolutely Mom, I love your cake."

"Here, have some cooking oil," her Mother offers. "Yuck" says her daughter.

"How about a couple raw eggs?" "Gross, Mom!"

"Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?" "Mom, those are all yucky!"

To which the mother replies: "Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake!

God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will all make something wonderful!

God is crazy about you. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning.

Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He can live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.

I've Learned

2008-10-11T01:00:00.000-07:00

I've learned - that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved The rest is up to them.

I've learned - that no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back.

I've learned - that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned - that it's not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned - that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes.
After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned - that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do.

I've learned - that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I've learned - that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I've learned - that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned - that you can keep going long after you can't.

I've learned - that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned - that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I've learned - that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I've learned - that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I've learned - that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned - that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I've learned - that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.

I've learned - that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned - that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

I've learned - that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned - that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I've learned - that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish.
Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I've learned - that your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't biological.

I've learned - that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned - that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned - that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I've learned - that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned - that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other and just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned - that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I've learned - that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I've learned - that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I've learned - that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.

I've learned - that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I've learned - that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned - that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned - that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I've learned - that it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe.

Instructions For Life

2008-10-10T01:00:00.000-07:00

1. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
2. Memorize your favorite poem.
3. Do not believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
4. When you say, "I love you," mean it.
5. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.
6. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
7. Believe in love at first sight.
8. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who do not have dreams do not have much.
9. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it is the only way to live life completely.
10. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name-calling.
11. Do not judge people by their relatives.
12. Talk slowly but think quickly.
13. When someone asks you a question you do not want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"
14. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
15. Say, "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.
16. When you lose, do not lose the lesson.
17. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions.
18. Do not let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
19. When you realize you have made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
20. Smile when picking up the telephone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
21. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other will.
22. Spend some time alone.
23. Open your arms to change but do not let go of your values.
24. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
25. Read more books and watch less TV.
26. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back,you will get to enjoy it a second time.
27. Trust in God but lock your car.
28. A loving atmosphere in your home is so important. Do all you can to create a tranquil harmonious home.
29. In disagreements with loved ones, deal with the current situation. Do not bring up the past.
30. Read between the lines.
31. Share your knowledge. It is a way to achieve immortality.
32. Be gentle with the earth.
33. Pray. There is immeasurable power in it.
34. Never interrupt when you are being flattered.
35. Mind your own business.
36. Do not trust a man/woman who does not close his/her eyes when you kiss.
37. Once a year, go some place you have never been before.
38. If you make a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living. That is wealth's greatest satisfaction.
39. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of luck.
40. Learn the rules then break some.
41. Remember that the best relationship is one where your love for each other is greater than your need for each other.
42. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
43. Remember that your character is your destiny.
44. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

I am Contented

2008-10-09T02:44:00.000-07:00

I love this message and I thought of sharing with you all.

*****************************
Dearest Everyone,

A nice article about the happiness of being contented. I love it and hope every kind soul out there will like it too.

Today, upon a bus I saw a lovely girl with golden hair. I envied her, she seemed so happy, I wished I were as fair. When suddenly she rose to leave I saw her hobble down the aisle, She had one leg and wore a crutch, but as she passed, a smile.

I stopped to buy some candy. The lad who sold it had such charm. I talked with him, he seemed so glad. If I were late, it would do no harm.

And as I left he mentioned to me, "Thank you, you have been so kind. It's nice to talk with folks like you," he said, "you see, I'm blind."

Later while walking down the street, I saw a child with eyes of blue. He stood and watched the others play, he did not know what to do. I stopped a moment and said, "Why don't you join the others, Dear?" He looked ahead without a word, and then I knew he couldn't hear.

With legs to take me where I go,
With eyes to see the sunset's glow,
With ears to hear what I would know...

Forgive me when I whine!

I'm blessed indeed! This world is beautiful!!

- Original Wordings (Unknown)
- Amended Wordings (Bryan Tango)

Power of Encouragement

2008-10-02T06:12:00.000-07:00

There's a story about some frogs that taught a valuable lesson about life.

The story goes:

A group of frogs were traveling through the woods two of them fell into a deep pit. All the other frogs gathered around the pit. When they saw how deep the pit was they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all of their might. The other frogs kept telling them to stop, saying that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed of what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died.

The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did not you hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

**

An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through difficult times. A destructive word to someone who is down, can be what it takes to kill them. Be careful what you say. Speak life to those who cross your path.

Words are so powerful, its sometime hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way. Keep this in mind, and always be careful and think about what you have to say.

Life 5 Great Questions #5 Giving Blood

2008-09-30T10:25:00.000-07:00

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at Stanford Hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare and serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes, I'll do it if it will save Liz."

As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the colour returning to her cheeks.

Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away?"

Being young, the boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood.

Life 5 Great Questions #4 The Obstacle in Our Path

2008-09-29T10:23:00.000-07:00

In ancient times, a king had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock.

Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the king for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the big stone out of the way. Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables.

On approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. As the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the king indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway.

The peasant learned what many others never understand. Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve one's condition.

Life 5 Great Questions #3 Always remember those who serve

2008-09-26T01:43:00.000-07:00

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 year old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. "How much is an ice cream sundae?"

"Fifty cents," replied the waitress. The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied a number of coins in it.

"How much is a dish of plain ice cream?" he inquired. Some people were now waiting for a table and the waitress was a bit impatient.

"Thirty-five cents," she said brusquely. The little boy again counted the coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and departed. When the waitress came back, she began wiping down the table and then swallowed hard at what she saw.

There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies - her tip.

Life 5 Great Questions #2 Pickup in the Rain

2008-09-26T01:40:00.000-07:00

One night, at 11:30 PM, an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rain-storm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride.

Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her - generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxi-cab. She seemed to be in a big hurry! She wrote down his address, thanked him and drove away.

Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console colour TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached. It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes but my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away. God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."

Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole

Life 5 Great Questions #1 Most Important Question

2008-09-25T23:45:00.000-07:00

During my second month of nursing school, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely this was some kind of joke.

I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.

Before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor.

"In your careers you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say 'hello'. "I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

5 questions to ask yourself on lifetime relationship

2008-09-23T00:08:00.000-07:00

A relationship coach lays out his 5 golden rules for evaluating the prospects of long-term success. When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake.

Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50 percent, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr./Ms. Right! If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll say We're in love. I believe is the #1 mistake people make when they date. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love (alone).

Though this may sound not politically correct, there's a profound truth here. Love (alone) is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come.

Let me say it again: You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone. You need a lot more. Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.

QUESTION #1:

Do we share a common life purpose?

Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live with someone. What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together?

You need to share something deeper and more meaningful. You need a common life purpose. Two things can happen in a marriage. You can grow together, or you can grow apart. 50 percent of the people out there are growing apart.

To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life - bottom line - and marry someone who wants the same thing.

QUESTION #2:

Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?

This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship.

Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust - i.e. trust that I won't get punished or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry.

QUESTION #3:

Is he/she a mensch? A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person.

How can you test? Here are some suggestions.

Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis?

Are they serious about improving themselves? A teacher of mine defines a good person as someone who is always striving to be good and do the right thing. So ask about your significant other: What do they do with their time?

Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement. There are essentially two types of people in the world: People who are dedicated to personal growth and people who are dedicated to seeking comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle.

QUESTION #4:

How does he/she treat other people?

The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure.

Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they wrapped up in themselves and self-absorbed? To measure this, think about the following:

How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as a waiters, bus boy, taxi driver, etc. How do they treat parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and appreciation? Do they show respect?

If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything, you cannot expect that they'll have gratitude for you-who can't do nearly as much for them! Do they gossip and speak badly about others?

Someone who gossips cannot be someone who loves others. You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly, will eventually treat you poorly as well.

QUESTION #5:

Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?

Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to improve them after they're married.

As a colleague of mine puts it, You can probably expect someone to change after marriage ... for the worse! If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them.

In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous.

The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart.

It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating, to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself in trouble because you didn't do your homework.

======================================
These are sound advices which I heed. In fact, it is very important to me that my husband actually likes to be around my family, relatives and friends, and he can mingle around with everyone and likewise for me with his family, relatives and friends. We have been together for six years and we have many more years to go.

If Life is Coffee...

2008-09-22T00:31:00.000-07:00

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university lecturer. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. Offering his guests coffee, the lecturer went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups: porcelain, plastic, glass, some plain-looking and some expensive and exquisite, telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the lecturer said: "If you noticed, all the nice-looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the better cups and are eyeing each other's cups."

"Now, if life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life, but the quality of life doesn't change."

"Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

Don't let the cups drives you... enjoy the coffee.

What is success?

2008-09-19T00:19:00.000-07:00

To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty;
To find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived;
This is to have succeeded.

============
Have you achieve your success? Me not yet but I believe I am on the way.

An Everyday Survival Kit

2008-09-17T19:43:00.000-07:00

Toothpick
Rubber band
Band aid
Pencil
Eraser
Chewing gum
Mint
Candy Kiss
Tea Bag

Here's why:
Toothpick - to remind you to pick out the good qualities in others...

Rubber band - to remind you to be flexible, things might not always go the way you want, but it will work out...

Band Aid - to remind you to heal hurt feelings, yours or someone else's...

Pencil - To remind you to list your blessings everyday...

Eraser - to remind you that everyone makes mistakes, and it's okay...

Chewing gum - to remind you to stick with it and you can accomplish anything ...

Mint - to remind you that you are worth a mint to your heavenly father...

Candy Kiss - to remind you that everyone needs a kiss or a hug everyday...

Tea Bag - to remind you to relax daily and go over that list of God's blessings...

This is my gift to you. May God richly bless you.

To the world, you may just be somebody...but to somebody, you maybe the world.

Send this to anyone who you think needs to know that they are loved by someone in their lives. Make someone's day just a little brighter today!

Letter to Dead Wife

2008-09-16T20:01:00.000-07:00

"Today is a special day. We both woke up at 4.30am. We stayed in bed for a while and chatted. You suggested that we get up to make ourselves a drink. I asked if I could lie down for another 5 minutes, you readily agreed. Like always you agree with me. Soon we got up to sit at the patio. You went to the kitchen and brought back two cups of hot coffee.

It was still dark. You switched on the floodlights of the garden and the garden looked beautiful. I praised you for your green fingers. I know you were delighted to hear that from me. I went down to the garden and invited you to take a walk with me to admire the beauty of the garden. We walked by the pool and commented on a straggly patch of new turf you had just planted. You assured me that straggly patch will soon grow into a neat grass patch.

We went back to the patio and I continued to admire the garden. I was especially appreciative of your effort that day with the work you had done in the garden. Every pot was neatly arranged. I pointed out a pot of plant and reminded you that that spot was the direct spot, which the afternoon sun will shine on. You told me that that plant particular loved lots of sunshine and it is the perfect spot for it. It was your last lesson for me in gardening.

I know you are proud of the garden. You have taken a lot of time, love and care to manage it. That is just like you. That is how you have taken care of the family too. Especially to me, you have always been so giving and loving.

We had a simple breakfast. Soon we have spent a wonderful 3 hours together in the morning. You went back to the bedroom to rest. When I went in you were snuggly in bed. I joined you and slept until the alarm went on.

I showered and got ready for a meeting at 9am. I took up my files and told you I am leaving. Immediately you got out of bed, still in your nightdress, you sent me off to work. Every morning you would wave me goodbye at the doorway. Before the car turned out I waved to you and saw you waving to me at the doorway in your nightdress. I have experienced this scene hundreds of times. But today this was our eternal parting. That was the last time I see my darling, Hup Ee. The image of you waving to me will forever be a lasting memory in my mind. I wish that scene on that morning happened again. I am willing to give all that I have to have that scene again. I cannot believe that you have left me.

It is now already past one in the morning. I will be finishing this letter soon. You have left me for almost 13 hours. I am tired. This day has been extra long. Very often I will work late into the late like tonight. I would slip quietly back into the bedroom to find you sleeping soundly in bed. But tonight the bed is empty. When I remove the comforter, the bed is cold. Where is my darling Hup Ee? Where is my darling Hup Ee?

I will never forget the laughter and joy you brought to your friends and me. I will miss the pair of slender and gentle hands that took care of me. I fondly referred to your hands as "sparrow hands", because they are small like sparrows. Goodbye my darling Hup Ee. We will meet again."

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(Written by Mr Peter Chen, Senior Minister of State for Education for his beloved wife Chen Hup Ee, who past away in an accident on the 17 Dec 1998.)

This letter was read out during the funeral on Monday morning, by Peter Chen himself. He cried and was very emotional yet he continued to read the letter because he wanted to share his feelings with his friends and colleagues and family.

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I have this through my email from a friend and I find it so touching that I can't bear to delete just like that. So I saved a copy and now I'm putting on my blog that more people can read it and remember it.

Just A Bowl of Noodle

2008-09-16T04:28:00.000-07:00

That night, Sue had a quarrel with her mum and without bringing anything with her, she ran out of the house. While she was walking on the street, she discovered that she did not have any money on her, not even a cent to make a phone call. As she was walking along the street, she spotted a noodle stall, it smells so nice, how she longs for a bowl. But, she has no money.

After awhile, the boss seeing Sue standing in front of his stall for quite a long time, asked: 'Hey Miss, do you want a bowl of noodle?'

'But...but...I didn't bring any money with me...' she answered shyly.

'It's alright, I'll give you a treat.' The boss said, 'Come have a seat, I'll cook you a bowl of noodle.'

Not long after, the owner served Sue with a bowl of noodle and a plate of vegetables. Sue ate a few mouthfuls and she started to tear. 'What happened, Miss?' the owner asked. 'Nothing, I'm just touched!' Sue said while drying her tears. 'Even a stranger I met on the street would offer to cook a bowl of noodle and treat me! But... my own mother, after a quarrel chased me out of the house and asked me not to go back again. You as a complete stranger could show me care and concern while my own mother...she's so cruel.' She said to the owner.

The boss after hearing what Sue had said, replied with a sigh: 'Miss, how can you think that way? Ponder over this, I just cooked a bowl of noodle for you and you are so touched. Your mother had been cooking noodles and rice for you since you are young till now, why aren't you grateful to her? And you even quarrel with her?'

Sue was stunned upon hearing that. 'Why didn't I think of that? A bowl of noodle from a stranger and I'm so grateful but yet my own mother had been cooking for me for so many years and I'm not even showing the least concern about her. And because of a trivial matter, I quarreled with her.' She finishes her noodle swiftly and braces herself up and march towards the direction of home.

As she was walking home, she thought to herself what she wants to tell her mum right now... 'Mum, I'm sorry, I know I'm at fault, please forgive me.'

Once she reached the doorstep, she saw her tired and anxious mother, searching everywhere for her. When she spotted Sue, the first sentence which came out of her mouth is: 'Sue, come into the house quickly, I've the dinner ready and it'll be cold if you are not eating it now.'

Right at that moment, Sue was unable to hold her tears anymore and she started weeping in front of her mum.

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At times, we may be very grateful to other people around us for a little gesture they showed us, but to our close ones, especially our parents, it's a lifetime of gratefulness we have to remember. We should never forget what our parents had done for us but often we treat that as a natural process for them to sacrifice for us.

However, parent's love and care are the most valuable gift given to us since we were born. They don't expect any repayment from us for raising us but think about it... Did we treasure the unconditional sacrifice from our parents?

How to Dance in the Rain

2008-09-14T20:08:00.000-07:00

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80's arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb.

He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00am. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would be able to see him.

I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?'

He smiled as he patted my hand and said, 'She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is.'

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, 'That is the kind of love I want in my life.'

True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

With all the jokes and fun that are in e-mails, sometimes there is one that comes along that has an important message. This one I thought I could share with you:
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; They just make the best of everything they have.

'Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain'

The Frog Story

2008-09-12T18:47:00.000-07:00

There's a story about some frogs that taught a valuable lesson about life.

The story goes:

A group of frogs were traveling through the woods two of them fell into a deep pit. All the other frogs gathered around the pit. When they saw how deep the pit was they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all of their might. The other frogs kept telling them to stop, saying that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed of what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died.

The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did not you hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.

*******
An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through difficult times. A destructive word to someone who is down, can be what it takes to kill them. Be careful what you say. Speak life to those who cross your path.

Words are so powerful, its sometime hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way. Keep this in mind, and always be careful and think about what you have to say.

===========================
Yeah i think so too, i used to love to draw but ever since my primary 6 Art teacher told me off on what I deemed to be my best drawings, I lost all interests. Although I dun recall how she looked like, I still hold a tinge of resentment for her.

Quote of the Day

2008-09-11T19:01:00.000-07:00

"If we are to be a really great people, we must strive in good faith to play a great part in the world. We cannot avoid meeting great
issues. All that we can determine for ourselves is whether we shall meet them well or ill."

Theodore Roosevelt (1858–1919)
26th president of the United States

So what have you choose for yourselves today - to face it or hide from it? I choose to face up to my problem and deal with it. Cheers ;p

Work Work Work

2008-09-10T20:13:00.000-07:00

A long time ago, there was an Emperor who told his horseman that if he could ride on his horse and cover as much land area as he likes, then the Emperor would give him the area of land he has covered.

Sure enough, the horseman quickly jumped onto his horse and rode as fast as possible to cover as much land area as he could. He kept on riding and riding, whipping the horse to go as fast as possible. When he was hungry or tired, he did not stop because he wanted to cover as much area as possible.

Came to a point when he had covered a substantial area and he was exhausted and was dying. Then he asked himself, "Why did I push myself so hard to cover so much land area? Now I am dying and I only need a very small area to bury myself."

==================================
The above story is similar with the journey of our Life. We push very hard everyday to make more money, to gain power and recognition. We neglect our health, time with our family and to appreciate the surrounding beauty and the hobbies we love.

One day when we look back, we will realize that we don't really need that much, but then we cannot turn back time for what we have missed.

Life is not about making money, acquiring power or recognition. Life is definitely not about work! Work is only necessary to keep us living so as to enjoy the beauty and pleasures of life. Life is a balance of Work and Play, Family and Personal time. You have to decide how you want to balance your Life. Define your priorities, realize what you are able to compromise but always let some of your decisions be based on your instincts. Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of Life, the whole aim of human existence.

So, take it easy, do what you want to do and appreciate nature. Life is fragile, Life is short. Do not take Life for granted. Live a balanced lifestyle and enjoy Life!

Watch your thoughts ; they become words.
Watch your words ; they become actions.
Watch your actions ; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

Food for Thoughts

2008-09-09T00:34:00.000-07:00

A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet. He held up a sign which said: 'I am blind, please help.' There were only a few coins in the hat.

A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new words.

Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy. That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to see how things were. The boy recognized his footsteps and asked, 'Were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?'

The man said, 'I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way.'

What he had written was: 'Today is a beautiful day and I cannot see it.'

Do you think the first sign and the second sign were saying the same thing? Of course both signs told people the boy was blind. But the first sign simply said the boy was blind. The second sign told people they were so lucky that they were not blind. Should we be surprised that the second sign was more effective?

Moral of the Story: Be thankful for what you have. Be creative. Be innovative. Think differently and positively.

Invite others towards good with wisdom. Live life with no excuse and love with no regrets. When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1000 reasons to smile. Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear. Keep the faith and drop the fear.

Great men say, 'Life has to be an incessant process of repair and reconstruction, of discarding evil and developing goodness.... In the journey of life, if you want to travel without fear, you must have the ticket of a good conscience.'

The most beautiful thing is to see a person smiling... And even more beautiful is, knowing that you are the reason behind it!!!

Food As Medicine

2008-09-08T23:51:00.000-07:00

HEADACHE? EAT FISH!
Eat plenty of fish -- fish oil helps prevent headaches. So does ginger, which reduces inflammation and pain.

HAY FEVER? EAT YOGURT! Eat lots of yogurt before pollen season. Also-eat honey from your area (local region) daily.

TO PREVENT STROKE DRINK TEA! Prevent buildup of fatty deposits on artery walls with regular doses of tea. (actually, tea suppresses my appetite and keeps the pounds from invading....Green tea is great for our immune system)!

INSOMNIA (CAN'T SLEEP?) HONEY! Use honey as a tranquilizer and sedative.

ASTHMA? EAT ONIONS!!!! Eating onions helps ease constriction of bronchial tubes. (when I was young, my mother would make onion packs to place on our chest, helped the respiratory ailments and actually made us breathe better).

ARTHRITIS? EAT FISH, TOO!! Salmon, tuna, mackerel and sardines actually prevent arthritis. (fish has omega oils, good for our immune system)

UPSET STOMACH? BANANAS - GINGER!!!!! Bananas will settle an upset stomach. Ginger will cure morning sickness and nausea.

BLADDER INFECTION? DRINK CRANBERRY JUICE!!!! High-acid cranberry juice controls harmful bacteria.

BONE PROBLEMS? EAT PINEAPPLE!!! Bone fractures and osteoporosis can be prevented by the manganese in pineapple.

PREMENSTRUAL SYNDROME? EAT CORNFLAKES!!!! Women can ward off the effects of PMS with cornflakes, which help reduce depression, anxiety and fatigue.

MEMORY PROBLEMS? EAT OYSTERS! Oysters help improve your mental functioning by supplying much-needed zinc.

COLDS? EAT GARLIC! Clear up that stuffy head with garlic. (remember, garlic lowers cholesterol, too.)

COUGHING? USE RED PEPPERS!! A substance similar to that found in the cough syrups is found in hot red pepper. Use red (cayenne) pepper with caution-it can irritate your tummy.

BREAST CANCER? EAT Wheat, bran and cabbage Helps to maintain estrogen at healthy levels.

LUNG CANCER? EAT DARK GREEN AND ORANGE AND VEGGIES!!! A good antidote is beta carotene, a form of Vitamin A found in dark green and orange vegetables

ULCERS? EAT CABBAGE ALSO!!! Cabbage contains chemicals that help heal both gastric and duodenal ulcers.

DIARRHEA? EAT APPLES! Grate an apple with its skin, let it turn brown and eat it to cure this condition. (Bananas are good for this ailment)

CLOGGED ARTERIES? EAT AVOCADO! Mono unsaturated fat in avocados lowers cholesterol.

HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE? EAT CELERY AND OLIVE OIL!!! Olive oil has been shown to lower blood pressure. Celery contains a chemical that lowers pressure too.

BLOOD SUGAR IMBALANCE? EAT BROCCOLI AND PEANUTS!!! The chromium in broccoli and peanuts helps regulate insulin and blood sugar.

Kiwi: Tiny but mighty. This is a good source of potassium, magnesium, Vitamin E & fiber. It's Vitamin C content is twice that of an orange.

Apple: An apple a day keeps the doctor away? Although an apple has a low Vitamin C content, it has antioxidants & flavonoids which enhances the activity of Vitamin C thereby helping to lower the risks of colon cancer, heart attack & stroke.

Strawberry: Protective fruit. Strawberries have the highest total antioxidant power among major fruits & protects the body from cancer causing, blood vessels clogging free radicals. (Actually, any berry is good for you..they're high in anti-oxidants and they actually keep us young........blueberries are the best and very versatile in the health field........they get rid of all the free-radicals that invade our bodies)

Orange: Sweetest medicine. Taking 2 - 4 oranges a day may help keep colds away, lower cholesterol, prevent & dissolve kidney stones as well as lessen the risk of colon cancer.

Watermelon: Coolest Thirst Quencher. Composed of 92% water, it is also packed with a giant dose of glutathione which helps boost our immune system. They are also a key source of lycopene - the cancer fighting oxidant. Other nutrients found in watermelon are Vitamin C & Potassium. (watermelon also has natural substances [natural SPF sources] that keep our skin healthy, protecting our skin from those darn suv rays)

Guava & Papaya: Top awards for Vitamin C. They are the clear winners for their high Vitamin C content. Guava is also rich in fiber which helps prevent constipation. Papaya is rich in carotene, this is good for your eyes. (also good for gas and indigestion)

Tomatoes are very good as a preventative measure for men, keeps those prostrate problems from invading their bodies.

The 3 Doors of Wisdoms

2008-09-07T23:29:00.000-07:00

A King had, as only son, a young Prince, brave, skillful and intelligent. To perfect his knowledge of Life, he sent him by the side of an Old Wise Man.

"Bring Light to my Path of Life", the Prince asked.

"My words will faint away like the prints of your steps in the sand", the Wise Man answered. However, I want to give you some indications. On your Path, you will find 3 doors. Read the rules written on each of them.

An irresistible need will urge you to follow them. Don't try and get away from them, because you would be condemned to live again, ceaselessly, what you have avoided. I may tell you no more.

You have to feel all this deep in your heart and in your flesh. Go, now. Follow this path, right in front of you. "

The Old Wise Man disappeared and the Prince entered the Path of Life.

He was soon in front of a big door, on which one could read: "CHANGE THE WORLD".

"It was my intention indeed", the Prince thought, "because if some things please me in this world, others greatly displease me."

And he began his first fight. His ideal, his ardour and his power urged him to confront himself to the world, to undertake, to conquer, to model reality according to his desires.

He found there the pleasure and the dizzyness of the conqueror, but no peace in his heart. He managed to change some things but many others resisted to him. Many years passed.

One day, he met the Old Wise Man who asked him:

"What have you learnt on your path?"

"I have learnt," the Prince answered, "how to discern what is within my power and what is without, what depends on me and what does not depend on me".

"That's good!", the Old Man said. "Use your strength to act on what is within your power. Forget what's beyond your power." And he disappeared.

A bit later, the Prince was in front of a second door. He could read on it: "CHANGE THE OTHERS".

"It was my intention indeed", he thought. "The others are a source of pleasure, enjoyment and satisfaction, but also, of pain, bitterness and frustration."

And he rebelled against everything that could disturb him or displease him in his fellow men. He tried to bend their characters and to extirpate their defects.

It was there his second fight.

Many years passed.

One day, as he was meditating on the utility of the attempts to change the others, he met the Old Wise Man who asked him: "What have you learnt on your path?"

"I have learnt", the Prince answered, "that the others are not the cause or the source of my joys and my punishments, my satisfactions and my setbacks. They are only opportunities for all of them to be revealed. It is in myself that all these things have their roots."

"You are right," the Wise Man said. "According to what they wake up in you, the others reveal you to yourself. Be grateful to those who make your enjoyment and pleasure vibrate.

But be also grateful to those who create in you suffering or frustration, because, through them, life teaches you what is left in you to learn and the path that you still have to walk."

And the Old Man disappeared.

A bit further, the Prince arrived in front of a door, on which these words were written: "CHANGE YOURSELF".

"If I am myself the cause of my problems, it is indeed what's left in me to work on", he said to himself.

And he began his 3rd fight. He tried to bend his character, to fight his imperfections, to abolish his defects, to change everything that did not please him in himself, everything that did not correspond to his ideal.

After many years of this fight, in which he met some success, but also, some failures and some resistances, the Prince met the Wise Man who asked him: "What have you learnt on your path?"

"I have learnt", the Prince answered, "that there are things that we can improve, others that resist to us and that we can't manage to break."

"That's good!" the Wise Man said.

"Yes", the Prince went on, "but I am beginning to be tired of fighting against everything, against everybody, against myself. Won't there be an end to it one day? When shall I find a rest? I want to stop fighting, to give up, to abandon everything, I want to let go !"

"It is precisely your next lesson", the Old Wise Man said. "But before going any further, turn round and behold the path covered."

And he disappeared.

On looking back, the Prince saw in the distance the 3rd door, and noticed that it was carrying a text on its back, saying : "ACCEPT YOURSELF."

The Prince was surprised not to have seen this writing when he went through the door, the other way.

"When one fights, one becomes blind", he said to himself. He also saw, lying on the ground, scattered around him, everything he had thrown away and fought against in him: his defects, his shadows, his fears, his limits, all his old worries. He had learnt then how to recognize them, to accept them, to love them. He had learnt how to love himself without comparing himself to the others any more, without judging himself, without reprimanding himself.

He met the Old Wise Man who asked him: "What have you learnt on your path?"

"I have learnt", the Prince answered," that hating or refusing a part of myself, it is to condemn myself never to be in agreement with myself. I learnt how to accept myself, totally, unconditionally."

"That's good!", the Old Man said, it is the first rule in Wisdom. Now you can go back through the 3rd door."

He had no sooner reached the other side, that the Prince perceived far away the back side of the second door, on which he could read: "ACCEPT THE OTHERS".

All around him, he could recognize the persons he had been with all his life through; those he had loved as well as those he had hated. Those he had supported and those he had fought.

But the biggest surprise of all for him was that now, he was absolutely unable to see their imperfections, their defects, what formerly had embarrassed him so much, and against which he had fought.

He met the Old Wise Man again.

"What have you learnt on your path?" he asked him.

"I have learnt", the Prince answered, "that by being in agreement with myself, I had no more anything to blame in the others, no more anything to be afraid of in them. I have learnt how to accept and to love the others, totally, unconditionally."

"That's good!", the Old Wise Man said. "It is the second rule in Wisdom. You can go back through the second door."

On reaching the other side of the second door, the Prince perceived in the distance the back side of the first door, on which he could read: "ACCEPT THE WORLD".

"Strangely enough", he said to himself, "that I did not see these words on the first time". He looked all around him and recognized this world which he had tried to conquer, to transform, to change. He was struck by the brightness and the beauty of every thing. By their perfection.

Nevertheless, it was the same world as before. Was it the world which had changed or the glance he had on it?

He met the Old Wise Man who asked him: "What have you learnt on your path?"

"I have learnt", the Prince said, that the world is a mirror for my soul. That my soul can't see the world, it sees itself in the world. When my soul is cheerful, the world seems cheerful to it.

When it is overcome, the world seems sad to it. The world itself is neither sad nor cheerful. It IS there; it exists; it is everything. It was not the world that disturbed me, but the idea that I had of it. I have learnt to accept it without judging it, to accept it totally, unconditionally. "

"It is 3rd rule of Wisdom", the Old Man said. "You are here now in agreement with yourself, with the others and with the World."

A profound feeling of peace, serenity, plenitude, filled the Prince. Silence was in him.

"Now, you are ready to go past the last Threshold", the Old Wise Man said, "the one that goes from the silence of Plenitude to the Plenitude of Silence ".

And the Old Man disappeared.

(Text proposed by Françoise Laurent)

Lord Buddha said. . . . . . .

2008-09-04T21:00:00.000-07:00

Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful.
What we think, we become.
Do not overrate what you have received, nor envy others. He who envies others does not obtain peace of mind.
An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind.
Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds.
To be idle is a short road to death and to be diligent is a way of life; foolish people are idle, wise people are diligent.
Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true
and kind, they can change our world.
Anger will never disappear so long as thoughts of resentment are cherished in the mind. Anger will disappear just as soon as thoughts of resentment are forgotten.
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned.
Use and train your mind to get what you want. Instead of letting your mind to use you to get what mind wants.

Hope this will give you the same enlightenment like I have.

I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart

2008-09-02T20:37:00.000-07:00

I think this is my second time reading this article sent by a friend via email and every time I read it I always feel so touched. There are times when I feel that my husband is spending too much time on his work or he would also make me mad with his attitudes, but then I would also remember all the sweets things he have done for me... rubbing my feet when I feel pain; cook me supper when I'm hungry; replenish my shampoo when I run out of it... and many many more.

So I remind myself, it's okay he dun send me flowers or gifts on anniversaries but at least he remembers them; it's okay he dun spend as much time with me as I want him to but at least I know he's busy working to provide for the family.

*********************************************

To All Married Couples and Singles Who Intend to Get Married (Worth reading this)

====================================
When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; I had lost my heart to a lovely girl called Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, 30% shares of mycompany and the car. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life withme had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible… Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage…

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door every morning. I thought she was going crazy.

Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset.

I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office. On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest... I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning... This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me; she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.

Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished. Then she touched my forehead. "Do you have a fever?" She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death does us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up.. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote: 'I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart'

The small details of our lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, the property, the bank balance that matters. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

Relationships are made not to exploit, not to be broken.

We teach some by what we say
We teach some more by what we do
But we teach most by what we are
- Unknown

You don't get to choose how you are going to die, or when, but, you can decide how you are going to live, here and now.

Remember:
People will forget what you said...
People will forget what you did...
But people will never forget how you made them feel....

Love & Friendship

2008-08-27T21:31:00.000-07:00

These are all precious wisdoms which guide me in my life path.....

1) When one door of happiness closes, another opens but we often look so long at the closed door that we don't see the one which has been opened for us.

2) There are things you love to hear but you would never hear it from the person whom you would like to hear it from, but don't be deaf to hear it from the person who says it with his heart.

3) Don't go for looks' it can deceive; don't go for wealth even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile coz' only a smile makes a dark day seem bright. Hope you find that person.

4) The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them with our own image otherwise, we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.

Would you pick that flower from mountain cliff for me

2008-08-26T21:00:00.000-07:00

The following is abstracted from email that I received from friend and I would like to share with all of you.

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My husband is an engineer by profession. I love him for his steady nature and....I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders. Two years of courtship and now, five years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness.

I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings. I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband is my complete opposite, his lack of sensitivity, and inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about LOVE.

One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.

'Why?' he asked, shocked..

'I am tired. There are no reasons for everything in the world!' I answered.

He kept silent the whole night, seemingly in deep thought. My feeling of disappointment increased. Here was a man who was not able to even express his predicament, so what else could I expect from him?

And finally he asked me, 'What can I do to change your mind?'

Somebody said it right....it is hard to change a person's personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.

Looking deep into his eyes, I slowly answered: 'Here is the quesiton...If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind.'

Let's say; I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?

He said: 'I will give you an answer tomorrow! ..'
My hopes just sank by listening to his response.

I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes....

My Dear
'I would not pick that flower for you, but....please allow me to explain the reasons further...'

This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading.

'When you use the computer, you always mess up the software programs, and you cry in front of the screen. I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs. You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.

You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city. I have to save my eyes to show you the way. You always have the cramps whenever your 'good friend' approaches every month. I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy.
You like to stay indoors and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom. You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip
your nails and help to remove those annoying white hairs.

So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand...and tell you the colour of flowers, just like the colour of the glow on your young face....

Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do...I could not pick that flower yet...and die...'

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting...and as I continued reading...'Now that you have finished reading my answer, and if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favourite bread and fresh milk...'

I rushed to pull open the door and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread....

Now I am sure that no one will ever love me as he does and I have decided to leave the flower alone...

That's LIFE, and LOVE....

When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.. Love shows up in all forms, even in very small and cheeky forms. It has never been a model. It could be the dullest and most boring form...

Flowers and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true love stands...and THAT'S LIFE.

The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems, but those who learn to live with things that are less perfect.

Never Self-Doubt

2008-08-26T01:04:00.000-07:00

It's the same as doubting one own self. It's a poison that disintegrates own confidences and breaks up one's hope for better future.

Lately been going through hard times with a difficult boss who never appreciate your hard work and only sees your bad points, so much so that I began to doubt my own self as well... My eyes have been swollen for couples days.

Now that I have decided to move on, I felt so much better and I'm looking forward to better life ahead.

I too wish every one out there not having to go through such dark periods. Never Self Doubt.

Be Yourself

2008-08-24T23:06:00.000-07:00

I like to share with anyone who reads my blog. This is what I strive to do every day - just to be myself, be true to what I believe in and believes in the goods of everyone.

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BEATITUDES

Be understanding to your enemies.
Be loyal to your friends.
Be strong enough to face the world each day.
Be weak enough to know you cannot do everything alone.
Be generous to those who need help.
Be frugal with what you need yourself.
Be wise enough to know that you do not know everything.
Be foolish enough to belief in miracles.
Be willing to share the sorrow of others.
Be a leader when you see a path others have missed.
Be a follower when you are shrouded by the mists of uncertainty.
Be the first to congratulate an opponent who succeeds.
Be the last to criticize a colleague who fails.
Be sure where your next step will fall so that you will not stumble.
Be sure of your final destination in case you are going the wrong way.
Be loving to those who love you. Above all, be yourself.